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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 years ago

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Fully Completely 2

Warnings: non-consent sex and rape (series), violence, mutual irritation.

This is dark!Loki x reader and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Series Synopsis: There’s a new face in Birch and he’s come to haunt your door.

Sister series to Smalltown Bringdown, When the Weight Comes Down, and Little Bones

Note: Here’s part two and things are getting aggressive fast.

Thanks to everyone for their patience and feedback. :)

I really hope you enjoy. 💋

<3 Let me know what you think with a like or reblog or reply or an ask! Love ya!

Chapter 2: Either it'll move me

💀💀💀

Usually your work kept you busy and if you were busy, you were content. Not that day. Not since that man ruined your lunch. You were so worked up that when you got back to the garage, you didn’t even finish your sandwich. You barely got anything done as what you did had to be redone in your distraction.

The night was little better as you planned to get the car done so the next time Loki bothered you, you could tell him to fuck off. If his headlight did come in before he left town, you’d send it down to Carl’s to have the work done. You would take the cost from what Bucky gave you to cover your time.

You were on your second coffee by the time you headed down to the garage, your apartment conveniently above as your existence was relegated to that single lot in Birch. At the bottom step you paused as you sipped from the travel mug and listened to the unexpected noise from behind the black door.

You locked all the doors at night, even that between the entryway and the garage that you kept propped open during the day. You stepped closer and tested the handle and bent to examine the lock. You glanced over at the painted front door and found that both had been picked.

Your fingers tightened on the mug. The last person to break into your garage, well, they weren’t around to bother you anymore after Jerome found out. You swung the door open and hauled the hot coffee across the garage towards the only sign of movement.

Loki sidestepped the splash, a few drops along his dark jacket, and continued to tighten and untighten the wrench. He looked at you nonchalantly and his mouth slanted. He shook his head as he let the tool hang perilously from his hand.

“Is this how you treat all your customers? This ungainly assault,” he peered down at the overturned cup beside his car.

“What the fuck are you doing in my garage?” you huffed as you marched over to him and reached for the wrench.

He gripped it tighter as you tried to snatch it from him and held you close as he sneered down at you.

“Two days,” he said “correct?”

“Tomorrow by my count,” you rebuked and pulled harder on the wrench, “not that it gives you any right to break into my garage and touch my stuff.” He let you yank the metal free of your grasp and you pointed it at his chin, “so leave or this time I won’t miss.”

He chuckled, barely bothered by the tool pointed at him as his green eyes sparkled, “your count is incorrect. I might be early but your work is due this evening so I will wait.”

“Not here,” you waved the wrench at him and grabbed his arm, “so get out and come back later then.”

His hand covered yours and he pried your fingers from him. He twisted your hand back and you gasped and swung the wrench with your other. You hit his shoulder as he raised his arm in defense and grunted at the sharp impact. He let you go and you swung again. He dodged and shoved you away from him.

“Do not presume to put your hands on me,” he warned, “you know who my brother is, that I associate with your cute local chapter--”

“I’m not one of them and I don’t report to them,” you snarled, “so get out now or you won’t be associating with anyone.”

“Mouthy little bitch,” he slithered, “you touch me again, or even attempt it--”

“I said get out,” you hit the hood of his car and left a dent, “It’ll be another day at least.”

His nostrils flared and his eyes narrowed. He fixed his jacket and sighed. He raised his chin and stiffly strode across the garage and through the black door. You followed feet behind him and made sure he continued outside. You cranked the lock behind him and listened to his footsteps crunch through the snow.

You might not report to Bucky and his goons but he was going to keep the rabble in line.

💀

It was just after noon but you knew Bucky would already be at The Asp. You ventured down the street in your heavy boots, your jacket flapping open in the wind as you were set on your destination and the conversation that awaited you. You nodded at the man who leaned a few feet from the door and sucked on a cigarette.

You entered and shook the snow off your lined denim jacket and kicked off your boots. You looked around at the mostly empty bar. You rarely went there as it was more trouble than you needed. The men were drunk and dirty and like many places in Birch, you just didn’t fit. You didn’t want to fit.

Bucky sat at his usual table, a woman you recognized beside him. She had been a year or two ahead of you in school and a couple behind Bucky himself. You knew she was his new girl but she never really looked happy about it. Knowing him, it didn’t surprise you. He always wanted more than he got.

You crossed to him and stood in front of the round table as his right-hand thug watched you curiously. You raised a brow at Steve and focused on the boss.

“We need to talk,” you said plainly.

“We do?” he asked genuinely confused, “I owe you something?”

“You do and you don’t. I’m not here about money,” you replied, “but it’s important.”

“Alright,” he pointed to the chair in front of you and gestured to his companions, planting a kiss on the woman’s lips before she stood, her lips slightly curled at the corner, and left you. He shifted in his chair as they went and nodded when he was ready, “sorry, if I knew you were on your way, I would’ve kept her in the back.”

You scoffed and shook your head. He was always obtusely arrogant. “I stopped fucking you, Buck, I don’t care who you’re with now.”

“Yeah, yeah, I remember,” he inhaled and placed his hand against the table, “so what is it?”

“This guy, Loki,” you began, “brought his car to me two nights ago.”

“Mhmm, I sent him down. I know I should come down myself but--”

“Please, you hate going down there,” you waved his words away, “it’s not about the car, it’s about him.”

“What about him?”

“He broke into my shop this morning. There was… well, I got a few licks in and for the sake of you I’ve held back but you need to keep him away from me. I’ll fix his car but I’m not dealing with him anymore. He’s a pompous asshole who thinks he can just do whatever he wants.” You stopped yourself, usually not one to go on at length, “he’s your… associate, as he would say it, so he can deal with you, not me.”

He considered you and pulled his hand back to scratch the stubble along his jaw. His blue eyes were intrigued if not surprised.

“He… coming onto you?” he asked.

“No,” you blinked at him dully, “no, he’s just annoying me. You promised me the shop would be my space. He picked my locks, Buck, so you let him know what’s what.”

“He’s new in town,” Bucky sighed, “but I’ll talk to him.”

“You better,” you stood, “because I don’t care about whatever business you got going on, the next time, I’m gonna pop his eye out with a--”

“Don’t be dramatic,” he snipped, “I’ll take care of him, alright?”

“You better,” you said as you backed away, “or you can find someone else to fix up your bikes.”

“Really? You know it won’t come to that,” he sat forward in irritation, “go, he won’t bother you.”

💀

The next day you looked over the front of the car. Aside from the cracked headlight, it was as good as new. You rolled up the garage door and took the keys from the hook. You drove the car out and steered it along the snowy street and parked just outside The Asp. You got out and headed inside to hand off the keys to Bucky with a promise that you would take care of the light when it came in as long as he kept Loki away.

You returned to the garage to close the door and checked the time. You were overdue for lunch and hadn’t been back to The Chipped Saucer since that eventful day. You were hungry and too lazy to climb up to your apartment and dig through your fridge.

You crossed the street and entered the diner as Kimmie looked up from the harlequin novel she hid behind as she stood by the till. She marked her page and closed it before she grabbed the carafe from the machine and crossed to your table. She poured you a mug and confirmed your usual order.

There were a few of the older residents enjoying pie and coffee at the other tables but the snow still kept many in their own houses. You might try the strawberry rhubarb before you went. You didn’t indulge in sweets often but it smelled good.

Kimmie brought your sandwich and as you finished the first triangle, you were disturbed by the last voice you wanted to hear. You didn’t look back as the door chimed behind the new patron and you continued chewing as you once more reviewed the newsletter.

To your chagrin but not unexpectedly, the figure appeared at your table side. You bit into the next portion of your club sandwich and ignored him.

“Hello, darling,” Loki sat across from you as he had days before, “I saw that you attended to my vehicle at last. Fine work, I must say. I do hope the headlight arrives soon.”

You said nothing and kept eating as you looked out the window and slid the newsletter aside with your other hand. You took the last gulp of your coffee and swallowed. You raised your cup and looked around, “‘scuse me,” you called out, “when you have a second.”

He laughed to himself and you felt his gaze on you. You pushed aside your uneaten crust and went about your meal as if he wasn’t there. When Kimmie refilled your coffee, he ordered a tea and a bowl of the daily soup.

You barely withheld your grimace as you watched Babs across the street by her bakery. She dusted snow off the open sign before she retreated back inside.

“I’m pleasantly surprised by the food here,” he mused as he stirred a plume of milk into his tea.

“Can’t you take a hint?” you snapped, “I don’t want you near me.”

“Believe me, at first, the feeling was mutual, darling,” he said.

“I told you not to call me that,” you frowned at him directly and he smirked.

“I like the way it makes your eyes go,” he taunted, “admittedly, that first meeting I would’ve liked nothing other than to never encounter you again but the more I poke and prod you, the more intrigued I am.”

“If you don’t stop--”

“You’ll go back to Barnes, hmm?” he intoned, “yes, he did speak with me but I might enlighten you on one fact. The man requires my business more than a mechanic, especially as there seems to be healthy competition in town.”

“You have your car, you’ll have the headlight done, and you can be on your way out of town,” you growled, “and you can be far away from me. Whatever stupid game you’re playing at, I’m not biting. I meant it when I said I won’t miss--”

“Darling, this is not an invitation,” his eyes strayed from your face for just a moment and he considered the buttons of your flannel shirt, “a man like me doesn’t ask, he expects.”

Your eyes rolled so hard it hurt. You pushed your plate away and pulled out your wallet. You left your tab on the table and stood. You shrugged into your jacket and glanced out the window at the white main street.

“Whatever you expect, it’s not going to happen,” you rebuffed, “but I told you what you can expect if you come around me again.”

You left as you had days before and stormed across the street without looking. You dodged out of the way of a slow rolling Ford as it honked and you waved them off. You stomped up to the front of your shop and realised too late you were being followed.

You spun around at the door to face Loki as he slid to a stop. He grabbed your arm and drew you back from the painted wood. You hit his chest and he barely flinched as he flicked your chin with his finger.

“Oh, darling, let’s not drag this out, I do love that temper--”

“Get off--” you pushed him and he nearly slipped and took you down with him as his leather soles held no traction on the frozen ground.

He threw you back and you hit the corner of the doorframe and gasped out as it forced the air from you.

“I promise you, it won’t last. I will damp out that flame and bask in the smoke,” he neared again and you kicked out. He fell to his knees as the force of it had you on your ass.

You crawled away from the wall as he tried to stand and you grabbed onto his leg and pulled him back down. He slid back to his kneeS and gripped the collar of your coat. You hooked your arm around his neck and he jabbed your stomach, not as hard as he could, but a warning.

You brought your other arm up as you struggled to get a foothold and you managed to push you both back. You fell in tandem into the snow, your arms locked as he forced his fingers under them to keep them from snaking tighter. He was strong and you knew you could only do so much. You had to keep him on the ground.

He elbowed your ribs and you released him sharply. You rolled away from him as you panted and scrambled on your hands and knees. The frigid snow seeped through your jeans and burned your palms. You heard him behind you and you turned as you climbed to your feet unsteadily.

He was half-keeled as he got his feet set and his dark hair hung over his forehead as he glared through the strands. He stood straight and pushed back the mess of tangles and you faced him, ready for another brawl.

“Oh, this will be fun, darling,” he brushed the powder from his suit and his cheek twitched, “You needn’t worry about Barnes, you should be more worried about me.”

He puffed out a breath and spun swiftly, nearly slipping again on the icy walk. He headed back down to the street and you saw the tension between his shoulders as he pulled his jacket straight. He hurried across the road and you turned back to the garage.

It was a brief retreat, a chance to plot, you knew that much. You only had to outlast him and if you were anything, it was stubborn.

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chandelier-s-notebook · 3 years ago

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Hey look it’s chap 2! They won’t all come out today I promise.

(Also the other characters tagged appear later in this chapter after the :readmore: this isn’t cross tagged for publicity purposes)

Let me know if you wanna get tagged when I post new chapters in “These Streets Are Made For Walking”. @sleepysnails.

Ao3 Link

-------------------------

After school, Dream, George, and Sapnap tossed their bags into Techno’s trunk. Technically, he and Dream did have PowerPoint projects to complete, but it was a solo project and he already finished it at lunch.

Snagging the shotgun seat, Sapnap cheered, “To the mall!”

Techno grimaced. At least Sapnap was excited.

Actually, there was one good thing that came from them: friendship. Techno had met Dream at one of these mall fights while they went to different middle schools, then they ended up at the same high school and started to drag Dream’s other friends to them. Techno didn’t mind George and Sapnap, they were just more Dream’s friends than his.

Techno drove them out of the city, and they cruised down the highway for twenty minutes before pulling off to the exit towards the abandoned mall.

“I’ve never understood why this shit happens right after school,” George said.

Dream answered him, “It’s because the cops think this stuff happens at night. They don’t think to look for this stuff during the day.”

“Plus, there’s a lot more of the other stuff going on, so they’re busy.”

“Why do you know that, Sapnap?”

“Reasons.”

Techno rolled his eyes at the trio, and pulled the first aid kit and his backpack out of the trunk. “I’m gonna stay in the car today.” He handed the box to George. “Math homework due tomorrow,” he explained.

“Ah man. That’s too bad,” Dream said, stretching out his arms. “More practice for me.”

“Maybe you’ll even beat me next time,” Techno joked.

Dream wheezed, and Sapnap had to push him away towards the building.

Techno got back in his car, cranked the radio, and blasted the AC, shutting the windows tight. Throwing the bag into the seat next to him, Techno pulled out his binder, and opened it to a fresh piece of graph paper. Study time lasted all of forty minutes before the sirens rang out.

“Snitch,” he muttered to himself. He slumped down in his seat, and pulled out his phone. He debated who to text before deciding that George was least likely to be busy at any given moment.

Techno Got snitched Cops in lot

George Fuck Dream says leave Drop our stuff at Bad’s Drop Tubbo with Punz

Techno Roger

A squad of four cars descended on the parking lot. Most of the officers stormed the mall, but three stayed behind. Two began making their rounds around the parking lot, but--of course--the other was left behind to secure the entrance. It was standard procedure, so Techno wasn’t very surprised to see this happening.

Techno made the decision to continue doing his homework rather than try to get away. He tossed his phone on the passenger seat and turned the radio off.

He was calm. He was cool. He was doing his math homework. He was rolling down the window when prompted by a tap on the glass.

“Captain Craft,” the officer stated.

“Pleasure,” Techno responded.

“License and registration.”

Techno grabbed his wallet from his backpack and gave Captain Craft his license. He leaned over to the glove box to grab his car’s registration. “Afternoon Sir,” he muttered, handing over his paperwork.

“Techno Blade? Unique name.”

Techno snorted at the officer’s attempt at small talk. “Was born with it, I'm afraid.”

“That’s cool.” He handed Techno back his paperwork. “What are you doing here?”

Techno gestured to the paper in his lap. “Homework. Got a calculus test next week.”

“Smart kid.” Captain Craft was writing things down in his notebook. “Do you know why the police were called to this location?”

“No Sir.”

“What brings you here?”

“A quiet space to work, the foster home gets really loud. Normally this place is empty.”

“Normally it is,” Captain Craft agreed. “So you don’t know anything about a potential drug deal?”

The surprise on Techno’s face was genuine. Yeah this was an illegal ring, but drug deals? Really? “No Sir. I’m just doing my homework.”

“You promise?”

“Yeah,” Techno said, not playing the officer’s game.

Captain Craft leaned back to look at the backseat.

Techno had never been more thankful that Dream, Sapnap, and George liked throwing their stuff in the trunk for more leg room in the backseat.

Captain Craft patted the car. “Well. I feel comfortable letting you go free kid. Clearly you have nothing to do with this.”

“No Sir.”

“Techno Blade was it?”

“Yes Sir.”

“Do you have a number we could potentially call if need be?”

Now, Techno would have loved to give the officer his home number--giving the police a direct line of contact with his cell didn’t sound good--but that was a horrible idea. One of the other kids would pick up the phone, and they’d talk. Or the Foster Bitch would pick up, and she’d just cuss out the poor person who called. “Yeah. Let me get you my cell number.”

Captain Craft scribed the number down in his notebook. He flipped the page and ripped off the next page. “Doctor’s note to get you out of the parking lot.”

Techno snorted as he grabbed the paper. “Thanks.”

Techno shifted the car into reserve and pulled out of his parking spot. He drove towards the checkpoint and didn’t roll up the window until the officer standing guard approved his departure.

Techno arrived at Sapnap and Bad’s house. He pulled into the parking spot in the apartment’s garage that Bad paid for, so Sapnap’s friends could leave their cars when they came over. He grunted in annoyance at the weight of the three backpacks; there also wasn’t a convenient way to carry three backpacks. He rode the elevator up to the first floor and buzzed Bad’s apartments.

“Who’s there?” Bad’s voice crackles through the intercom.

“Techno, I’m here for delivery and pickup.”

Bad laughed.. “Hi Techno, they’re in the middle of something so it’ll be a little while.” The buzzer sounds and Techno steps into the room, taking the elevator to Bad’s floor, which was unreasonably high. How was Sapnap supposed to climb through the window late at night at this height?

Although Techno was required to have someone buzz him in, he conveniently had his own key for the door, and could use that. Techno couldn’t be bothered to remember which room was Sapnap’s, but he knew where the guest room was, so he tossed all their stuff in there.

“Hi Bad. Have any snacks?” Techno asked, entering the kitchen. Mario Kart sounds floated over from the living room. “It’s time to go home!” Techno called out to the kids.

“Why?” Tommy yelled back.

“Because. Also Tubbo, Dream said that I’m dropping you off with Purpled at Punz’s place.”

“Oh.” Techno could hear the way Tubbo’s face fell. “He got into something again?”

Techno took the plate of sandwiches from Bad and brought them out to the boys. He gave Tubbo a tight smile. “Apparently, but he’ll be fine.”

Once the boys finished their game--Ranboo won--they all bid Bad adieu and head back for Techno’s car. The boys and their backpacks file in. Tommy sat up front; Tubbo situated himself on the middle hump, and Purpled and Ranboo arranged their legs accordingly.

He let the boys karaoke on the way to Punz’s place. They were very loud, but it helps that he didn’t have to worry about where he was going, as he is far more familiar with these streets than he would have liked to be.

Techno pulls into the driveway. “Get out.”

“Thanks for the drive Blade!” Tubbo said, following Purpled out of the backseat.

“Good luck!” Ranboo yelled after them, stretching his legs into the newfound space he had at his disposal.

“Stay safe!” Tommy shouted, only half joking. “Let’s get out of here.”

Techno pulled out of the area once Tubbo and Purpled had made it into the house. He then drove them out of the slums to the richer areas of the city where Ranboo lived. He parked the car in Ranboo’s cul de sac.

“This is my stop,” Ranboo said lowly.

“This is your stop.” After a few minutes of silence Techno spoke again. “You gonna get out?”

“Yeah. Yeah.” Ranboo opened the door. “Thanks for the ride!” He pushed it shut once outside and walked up the lawn to his manor.

Tommy waved goodbye to his friend then turned to look straight ahead. “Let’s go back now.”

“Are you still mad at me for hanging out with Dream?”

Tommy didn’t respond.

Techno pressed on the gas and brought the car back to the main road. “I’m allowed to have friends, kid. I don’t need to explain myself to you.”

“Then stop. Stop defending yourself. You don’t need my approval.”

“When did you get older than me?”

“When you started hanging out with kids who get put in the newspaper for petty crimes!”

“I’ve been hanging out with Dream since long before you even got here.”

“And? People change. Little Dream isn't big Dream!”

“I know who my friends are,” Techno bit.

“I hope you do. Because Tubbo is having a sleepover with Purpled which means Dream isn’t home. And you were there. So what happened?”

All of Techno’s pent up energy left his body, and he fell into a steely expression. “Nothing.”

“Something happened! Why isn’t Dream home?”

Techno turned on the radio.

“Tell me bitch boy!”

“Do you want to eat tonight?” Techno shouted back at him, turning to face him directly now that they were stopped at a red light.

Tommy’s eyes were wide. He had one hand on his seat belt buckle and one on the door handle. He was as pressed away from Techno as he could get in the car. He was holding his breath and his body was tense. “Please,” he whimpered.

Techno tensed up as well. He had gone too far. He knew he had gone too far. That wasn’t cool playing on Tommy’s fears like that. “Tommy--”

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’ll shut up. Please. I know it’s your stash. Please.”

“Tommy.” The light turned green. “We’ve been over this. My stash is your stash.”

Tommy mutely shook his head, refusing to reply.

Internally sighing, Techno tapped his finger on the side of the steering wheel, his brain working hard. He should have known not to say that with Tommy, but of course he had to mess up again.

The car behind them honked its horn loudly, jerking Techno out of his thoughts. He lifted his foot from the brake, and placed it down on the gas, accelerating forwards, and allowing the long line of traffic behind him to go.

Tommy still hadn't spoken, but was shaking slightly, and it wasn't because he was cold.

“My stash is your stash,” Techno reiterated, if only to fill the silence.

“No it’s not,” Tommy said in a small voice. “You keep saying it is, but it’s not.”

“Then steal from my stash to make your own stash. You’ve done that before.”

“Not from people I need to like me.”

Techno stopped looking at Tommy in hopes he would calm down slightly. “I do like you,” he reassured. “If I didn’t I wouldn’t be trying to convince you that we share a stash.”

Tommy fiddled with the radio stations and made a noncommittal sound of what Techno pretended was agreement.

Techno and Tommy spent the rest of the ride home in silence, Techno glancing at Tommy out of the corner of his eye the whole time.

When they arrived home, Techno put the car in park, and undid his seatbelt, but made no move to get out of the car. Twisting his neck, he looked Tommy in the eyes.

Techno knew what Tommy needed to hear, even if he hated having to need to say it. “You can eat tonight. Grab whatever you want from my stash.”

“Really?” Tommy asked more hopefully than Techno was comfortable with.

“Yeah.”

Tommy then bolted out of the car, as if to make sure he did the thing while he had permission before it was taken away abruptly.

Which Techno would never do. Techno was feeling like shit playing on Tommy’s insecurities to get him to shut up. That wasn’t cool and he knew that. Techno slowly pulled himself out of the car. He grabbed his backpack, and the one Tommy had left in his haste.

Walking slowly to the house, Techno gave Tommy some time to settle in before entering their shared space. Yes he generally wished that Tommy was quieter after 10pm, but tonight it would be for the wrong reasons.

At least Tommy didn’t seem to think Techno was about to hit him.

#Technoblade #Dreamwastaken #Sapnap #Georgenotfound #Badboyhalo #TommyInnit #Tubbo #Ranboo #Purpled #Philza #These Streets Are Made For Walking

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leavetwn · 4 years ago

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* AMANDA CAMPANA, NOBINARY + SHE/HER/THEY/THEM | you know RAMONA GALLO, right? they’re TWENTY-THREE, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, TWENTY-THREE YEARS? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to CRYING ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR BY MUNA like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole COLD PIZZA AS A HANGOVER CURE, TALKING SHIT ABOUT CUSTOMERS IN THE BREAKROOM, LONGING FOR WHAT COULD'VE BEEN, thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is AUGUST 17TH, so they’re a LEO, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( claire, 22, est, she/her )

HEY , BESTIES ! happy new year (the way it’s 11:55pm here so barely) !! my name’s claire and i’m 22. i’m livin in the est timezone, and my pronouns are she/her. i’m bringing y’all a mess of a muse 😈 because well ,,, it’s what i’m best at. if you’re feelin ramona & wanna plot, just go ahead and like this & i’ll hit you up. i usually plot on discord, but if you prefer the tumblr ims, that’s no problem at all. anyway, lemme stop waistin time and get to introducing you to ramona. * tw: mentions of cheating & alcohol.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬 .

full name: ramona gallo. nickname(s): anything your muse wants to call her tbh. age: twenty-three. date of birth: august 17th. zodiac sign: leo. gender/pronouns: non-binary, she/her/they/them. sexual orientation: bisexual. romantic orientation: biromantic. hometown: irving, north carolina. current residence: irving, north carolina. occupation: employee at zoinkies currently, a lifeguard during the summer. eye color: brown. hair color/style: had long hair up until her breakup then had one of those breakdowns and cut her own hair into a bob and then her own bangs. i bet it was a mess lol so she probably called her friends or went to a salon the very next day to get it fixed. also highlighted the ends red but her natural color is brown. height : 5′5″. clothing style: simple and comfortable. t-shirts, croptops, turtlenecks, all usually paired with either jean shorts or jeans in general. she prefers to feel cozy rather than cute. tattoos: yes. a small one on her wrist. wants more eventually. piercings: both ears peirced & a navel piercing that she did herself against better judgement lol.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐪𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐡𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 .

you were born on a scorching hot day in irving , your father says so, anyway. you’re convinced he’s being dramatic. your birth went smoothly; after two previous children, your parents had become disillusioned by childbirth. just another one to add to the bunch, and one that was meant to save a dying marriage. still, they loved you nonetheless. your father, to this day. your mother, until you were ten, and then she up and left without a warning.

your father keeps food on the table by fixing cars. you spend your days in the hot sun watching him replace parts and continuously try to crank vehicles until they run. he fist pumps every time one does. ‘ how lame, ’ you think, but it’s inspiring how hard he works to take care of three kids. and he does a good job.

therefore , you spend much of your early life trying to make him proud. you’re smart as a whip, and all your teachers have good things to say about you when it comes to academics. you’re a bit of a troublemaker, though. your father doesn’t mind that too much; he was the same at your age. and he’s proud — proud to see you work so hard.

you spend your teenage years doing much of the same. though , you begin to come home a bit later than usual, and your excuse is that you’ve been at ashley’s or samantha’s, but really all three of you were out partying. you don’t think your father would care (your grades are fine & he wants you to live like a normal teenager) , but you still lie about it. why ? well, who knows, maybe you like the adrenaline rush it gives you. like most things, you do them for the thrill.

you join the swim team. you’re kind of bad , but that’s okay. just like always , you work hard, and you realize that you’re kind of a natural. your father cheers louder than anyone else in the stands. it pushes you to do better. with your good grades and athletics , your guidance counselor tells you you’re a shoo in for a scholarship from whatever university you want. you apply to several. if it’s one thing you hate, its this town. you can’t wait to make it out, and you figure, this might be your only way.

you’re eighteen, and you’re in love. it’s crazy how love can make you see things differently. suddenly , this town doesn’t seem half bad. all your friends find it cute , and you tell them everything. the things he tells you or the way he makes you feel. it’s a crazy feeling; you never want it to end.

you throw your cap in the air. finally , high school is over. college is looming. you’ve been accepted to several & received scholarships from at least a few. you lie in bed thinking about it. now, you suddenly don’t want to leave so bad. don’t want to leave him behind. how could someone leave another they love so easily? it makes you hate your mother more.

for the first time, you disappoint your father. you don’t go to college. you don’t give a damn. you want to stay where love is. you’re addicted to the feeling. this lasts for three years. now, you’re twenty-one; you’ve gotten a job at zoinkies, and that keeps you away for most of the day. you randomly decide to visit your boyfriend during a lunch break one day. you find him in bed with someone else. suddenly , you realize love isn’t as addicting as you once thought. what once made the world beautiful now made it hideous. what once made you feel so high had somehow made you feel so low. it was horrible, and you’d realized your mistakes.

you threw away your future for love. something as rotten and twisted as love. something you swore you’d never let yourself feel again. something that you put away in a locked box with no key. irving was the same place you’d always known it to be. boring, drab, familiar. at least you had your family. that was barely enough to keep you sane, though, and it was hard to feel normal.

you turned to the thing that help. alcohol, partying, any escape at all. you lacked coping skills — that much was clear, but you didn’t care. you blamed it on something else entirely. just as your teachers had said, you’re a bit of a troublemaker. you do anything to make yourself feel alive, to make yourself feel free of the hurt.

it’s two years later now. you’re still not over it in some ways, as regret turns to anger and resentment. you’re bitter. who wouldn’t be? but you feel like you’ve had time to mourn. maybe it’s because you never acknowledged it in the way you should’ve ( it’s still locked away in that box. ) you still have your bad habits. you still work at your stupid job that you hate. you’re lost, but you’ll figure it out. you always do. so, you continue to float , seemingly stuck in the town that you never let go of, and you wonder what comes next. only time will tell.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐨𝐮𝐬 .

still swims but doesn’t have as much time for it. probably not as good, but since she spends the summer lifeguarding, she uses that time to practice & try to get back to where she was. also kinda jaded asf so even if she says she wants to get back into it, she probably won’t lmaoo.

is a horrible driver. how did she get a license ?? not even she knows. def the type to like have a leg up on the dash board, hand out the window, and only one hand on the wheel while speedin idk how she makes it out alive

can take a car apart and put it back together again thanks to her dad. also changes her own tires so let her change your tires. im just sayin

stays up way too late & would sleep until 2 pm everyday if she didn’t have to work. should probably work on being an adult and going to bed at a normal time but just half the time doesn’t give a fuck so she’s probably sleep deprived a lot. therefore also has a

character parallels: alice ayres/jane jones (closer, 2004) , clementine (eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, 2004) , fiona gallagher (shameless, 2011-present) , more to be added.

𝐈. ━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 .

ok but plots really do be making my world go ‘round. 😳 i love em, so literally hmu with anything you’re feeling, and i’ll be down. just wanna plot & write with everyone 💕 but here’s a couple of wanted connections for y’all. i’ll prolly have a most wanted tag sooner or later & i’ma be make a plot page soon.

* the unholy trinity — these two are the friends she cherishes most. i’m assuming they’ve been friends since at least early high school , maybe earlier. they went through a lot together. these two were with her through all her relationship troubles. true ride or dies. she’s do absolutely anything for them, and she trusts that they feel the same way. they’re rowdy & wild, do whatever they want, and have a damn good time doin it. also have a gc where they just talk shit and send tiktoks idk just gimme this plsss 🥺

* friends with benefits / one night stands — this would probably be the extent of ramona. clearly not over what happened to her the last time 😭, so she’d have plenty of these tbh. she probably wouldn’t think too much about it, but it could be awkward for you muse maybe, etc.

* unrequited love / crush — here’s a toast to the ones who crush on ramona. it would be an absolute tragedy lmaoo. she’s not really mean about it, but she is 100% certain she’s not looking for any type of relationship. could be really dramatic and messy and those are tha best kind. literally this

* former friends / enemies — she’s lived here her whole life, so she’s at least got one. these two just don’t get along/no longer get along for whatever reason that can be plotted out.

* coworkers — she works zoinkies throughout the year and picks up shifts as a lifeguard during the summer so your muses could know her from that. could delve into a close friend territory too lmao. they probably just sit in break rooms and talk about rude customers or bossy managers lmaooo.

* literally anything your heart desires — a lot could work. we could even just start from nowhere & have them meet for the first time if they’re newer/just to town.

#irvingintro #tw alcohol #tw cheating #it is so sick & twisted that i have another one to write i can't believe lol #but it must be done #hi luv me plot with me

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thewebcomicsreview · 6 years ago

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Can you maybe contextualize the Homestuck epilogue for someone who has never read Homestuck but is curious what all the hullabaloo is about?

It’s 200,000 words following 8,000 pages of comic, so I’m not sure if I can really explain it “simply”, but I’ll do my best. *ahem*

Spoilers, obviously.

tl;dr;, by the way, I actually really liked it. But I can see why a lot of people didn’t.

So, I can, have, and will rant about the myriad of reasons everyone hated the ending, but for the sake of context let’s only focus on the main ones:

1. The climax of the story was meant to be “John masters his powers, goes back in time, and undoes a lot of the terrible things that happen”. This didn’t at all feel like a climax, so everyone expected a “real” climax and was confused when we didn’t get one. Worse, because the solution to, say, Rose’s alcoholism was that John changed things so that she never started drinking, it felt less like characters overcoming their struggles and more like the characters we loved being replaced with alternate, better versions, and we never saw how things went for the “real” characters (John’s main change, preventing Vriska’s death in Act 5, invalidates something like 15% of the entire comic!).

2. Because the climax fell so flat and the big bad wasn’t defeated (and because [S] Collide ended with the music turning all sinister), everyone went in to Act 7 expecting one last huge twist. But while we were given enough information to figure out the basic gist of how Lord English was defeated, we don’t actually see it.The above screenshot, of Caliborn powering up into his Final Form, comes in the last fifty seconds of Homestuck.

So, that’s kind of the context of the ending. Everyone went in expecting like a full act, was wildly confused that Act 7 was a victory lap, and then we all kind of figured out eventually what Hussie was going for and we were like “Oh. Okay” in a monotone. So, everyone hoped for the epilogue to “fix” the plot, but the plot wasn’t so much broken as it was badly told.

Phew. Okay, now lets talk about the epilogue.

So, John is given the choice of whether to actually go back into the comic and kill the bad guy or not, represented as a choice of eating meat or candy for lunch. The canon, alpha timeline choice is to kill Lord English (”meat”), and the choice to stay behind and leave a time loop/plot thread unclosed (”Candy”) creates a doomed timeline. Doomed timelines in Homestuck exist as physical bubbles you can fly to, so the two “timelines” are really physical places in Paradox Space. There are three such location in the epilogue

1. The “meat” timeline, which is the actual “canon” alpha timeline with no unbroken time loops, where most of the Meat Epilogue takes place. It takes place in the normal universe

2. The furthest ring, a void above and around all timeline bubbles where John fights Lord English. This is normally where all the doomed timelines are, but they are getting sucked into a black hole that’s sweeping out all the “irrelevant” stuff

Nepetaquest 2019 was never meant to be

3. The “candy” timeline, which is doomed, irrelevant, and thus sucked into the black hole. The whole thing looks like this

The reason I’m explaining all this is because the two epilogues are actually one epilogue, and one affects the other such that you need to read them both.

In the Candy timeline, Dirk immediately realizes that he’s no longer canon/alpha, and immediately kills himself. Rose and Kanaya are happily married and adopt a troll. Roxy goes all stepford wife and decides all she really wants is to crank out babies with John. John is all “you seem to be wildly out of character for reasons that won’t be explained but okay”. Jade, Dave, and Karkat have a miserable polyamorous relationship where the boys don’t admit they want to each other’s dicks but are willing to settle on Jade’s furry knotted dog penis, which she apparently grew after becoming a dog girl in [S] Cascade

Pictured: The exact moment in Homestuck that Jade Harley grew canine genitalia. I had a print of this artwork and I’ll never look at it quite the same again

There’s relationship drama, but the most important part is Jane, who is now TrumpHitler for basically no reason,. She marries Jake but Gamzee cucks him and, well

There’s a scene of Jake talking to Jade and thinking about maybe murdering a baby while his wife has rape-play sex with a clown in the next room. We don’t have time to unpack all that, because Jane is also TrumpHitler now, and sets out to commit a literal holocaust on all the Trolls for….um…..well for no reason. She’s just evil now. Jade’s corpse crashes from the sky, which is a shock to everyone, most of all Jade. Then Aradia and Sollux show up and Jane’s corpse comes to life as a god and everyone kind of just….nods…..and ignores it. The JadeCorpse is possessed by a version of Calliope who’s basically God, whom Aradia serves. Calliope explains that nothing in this timeline matters and it would normally just dissolve but she’s keeping it around because letting everyone dissolve into nothing when you can stop it seems like kind of a bitch thing to do and also she needs somewhere for Lord English’s body to land. Everything in Candyland gets as comically terrible as possible, full-on civil war. John has an existential crises about being irrelevent but gets over it, and Calliope finally finds Lord English and eats him, gaining the power to escape the black hole. Somewhere all this Dave meets up with Barack Obama (??!!?!?!) who is a god (!!!!!!!!!!!) that fucked Dave’s bro (!efefiebnfuewf) and merges all Daves together into one Ultimate Dave that he puts in a robot. Davebot, Aradia, and Calliope all leave the black hole and close the door behind them such that nothing inside (which includes the “canon” Vriska and every single alternate Timeline that existed or will ever exist) can ever get out to interfere with the canon timeline ever again.

Also 16-year-old Vriska fucks 40-year-old Gamzee and is so embarrassed about it that she kills him.

Feel free to take a break here

==>

In the Meat timeline, Dirk has ascended and god from God-Like-Thor to God-Like-God, and can now manipulate the story in a fourth-wall breaking way that’s effectively nigh-omniscience and mind control. He’s also evil now, but that makes more sense then Jane being Hitler.

John recruits the pre-retcon versions of Dave, Rose, and Jade, who with John are the closest thing to the “original” versions of the main four that Homestuck is gonna give us at this point. They fight Lord English and successfully boot him into the black hole, but all die in the process. John is mortally wounded but survives long enough to bang Terezi in the back of his dad’s car and get them both home (said car ends up in Candyland, where Candy John finds it and recognizes Terezi’s cum because thanks Hussie). Jade lives long enough that she could get to Earth C herself, but this version of Jade doesn’t even know about Earth C and decides to die via black hole. Dirk tries to stop this, but Calliope, who is more powerful than Dirk, pulls her in

It is indeed to late, and OG! Jade gets sucked into the black hole, crashes into Candyland, and leaves behind a fresh corpse for Calliope to control and all the people in Candyland to be weirdly blase over because deep down they know their world doesn’t matter. Having control over this Jade lets her possess the alpha Jade in Meatworld, which in turn lets her influence things there. She and Dirk fight about who gets to be president of earth (which doesn’t seem important unless you read Candy and know what president Jane will do), and Dirk manages to tranquilize Jade and keep Calliope from affecting anything else.

Jane becomes president of Earth and starts off and the path of becoming God Empress of Mankind. John dies, and we get more than a hint that Dirk killed him for being insufficiently grateful of their paradise planet

With things on Earth taken care of, Dirk mind controls Rose into become his (sex?) slave, and mind controls Kanaya into thinking that’s cool. He tells Terezi (who he can’t control, since Mind is her power) that if she comes with they can maybe revive John, and they all home into a spaceship and fuck off to a new planet. Dirk is the new Lord English, Jane is the new Condesce, and Rose -now a dreambot - is the new Handmaid. And Terezi is….also there. They find a new M-Class planet and set up to evolve some life there for a Sburb game. On earth, now of of range of Dirk’s mind control, everyone realizes that him kidnapping Rose was actually kind of fucked up, and they hop a spaceship to chase after them, with Jade-possessed Calliope giving them advice.

And that’s the epilogue! Dirk has kidnapped Rose and become unto god, and is setting up a nefarious plan we don’t know the details of, and a the heroes are racing to stop him. Good night everybody!

I’m assuming there’s going to be an Epilogue Epilogue, because this was just a straight-up cliffhanger, and I’ll guess I’ll see when I think when that happens or when it becomes clear that won’t happen.

Hopefully that was easy enough to follow, I did my best.

#homestuck #sirksome #homestuck epilogue #homestuck spoilers

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lokisgame · 5 years ago

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A Generous Donation [8]

[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6] [part 7]

Mulder woke up to music and the scent of coffee, remembering last night and grinning like a madman. "I died and went to heaven," he said to the ceiling and got up. Though his neck and shoulder echoed a little, life still felt pretty good. He pulled a clean tee and jeans from the chest of drawers and headed for the shower. Pans and plates from in the kitchen told him she wasn't going anywhere.

Ten minutes later, he padded downstairs to see the living room straightened and Scully, by the stove in nothing but his yesterdays' t-shirt. Tips of her hair were wet and she swayed to Marley on the stereo. 'Is this love that I'm feeling' "From your mouth to God's ears, Bob," he thought.

Trying to be as quiet as possible, Mulder wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her in, moving with her as he kissed her cheek. "Good morning." "Hey, you sleep like a deadman," she breathed, leaning into him as he moved to her neck. "Rarely." Scully chuckled, squirming but not pulling back. "Do you ever shave?" "First Monday after fool moon, otherwise no." "So I'm stuck with a lumberjack," she said then turned and saw his smile ready to land on her mouth. His lips were soft and his hand on her ass felt warm and she forgot the scratchy beard, bending backwards and holding on, because he was just so tall. "I'll shave, right now," he said, breaking the kiss, rocking her to the music. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him back down. "On second thought, I like my man rugged sometimes." "Yeah? Then how about." Mulder bent his knees and grabbed her waist. "No, wait!" Floor vanished from under her feet and she grabbed his shoulders for balance, laughing, and a second later she was sitting on the counter, next to buttermilk and flour, trapped between his arms. "Pancakes will burn," she warned. "No they won't," he said giving the pan a little stir and cranking down the burner. Then hands framing her cheeks, he kissed her for real, slow and sweet but building as she drew him in. "There's some frozen bagels in the freezer, if you want," he breathed finally, keeping his forehead pressed against hers. "Cream cheese?" "Obviously." "Didn't find any." "Has to be," he frowned and let go to rummage through the fridge, "I swear I bought it last time." Scully hopped off the table and turned the heat back up under the pan, while around her doors banged open and closed. "There you are! Fraternising with the mayo, huh?" She laughed and he was back, bumping her away from the stove. "These will need a minute," he said loading four bagels into the oven. "You're surprisingly apt in the kitchen." "Well, at some point, I told myself that it's time to stop living like a frat boy and start behaving like a man." He got up and pulled two mugs from the cupboard above the coffee machine. "What kind of man can't feed himself." "An average man." Mulder chuckled filling her mug then handed it to her. "Well, then I'm an alien." "You're a role model," she took the mug and watched him take a sip. "Damn, you make a fine cup of coffee," he grinned, pecked her cheek and went to get the paper.

"So this is what you do," she said looking at the book in her hands. "It's a hobby." "Nine hundred pages, quite an extensive hobby, "I Want To Believe. A Psychologist's Take." "Yeah, it's kind of hard, to put it all in one book and still do the subject justice." "What is it about?" "People's stories mostly, self-proclaimed alien abductees, cryptozoologists, conspiracy theorists, your average outcast." "And the psychologist's take?" "I wanted to give these people some background, explain why they need to believe what they believe in, why the world dismisses and ridicules them, how it affects their lives and why they keep doing it anyway. Some of them are dreamers, some are scared for their lives and some went through things so bizarre that it's almost impossible to imagine, unless you're Steven Spielberg, on crack." "This is the book Will was raving about all summer." "Must have found a copy at the library." "Can I borrow it?" "Keep it, I've got a box of them in the basement." "I bet you give a copy to every girlfriend." "No," he chuckled, "not really." She folded herself beside him on the couch and he took the book from her, opening it on the fist page and signing it with a flourish before giving it back. Scully glanced at the inscription. "Hey, it says William, I thought it was for me." "You get the author," he smiled and pulled her legs over his lap, toppling them over, mouth on hers again. "I really should be going," she said a good while later, flushed and warm, tangled with him in the cramped space, again. "Will needs his mom," he agreed, doing absolutely nothing to let go. "My mom," Scully whined and hid her face in his chest. "She always goes to see him after church, and she'll be there today and nag me about the foundation thing." "What foundation thing." "She wants me to look for a donor through a foundation, and what she means by it, is that we should pay someone off and get Will bumped up the waiting list." "Is that even legal?" "No, but that's my mom for you, lie, cheat and steal for those she loves." "You blame her?" "No, but I don't want to think about it, unless I have absolutely no other choice." "Let me know if I can help." "You already helped," he mumbled into his tee, pulling him closer and his arms tightened around her, solid and undemanding. "You're easy to please." Scully laughed and made herself let go. "Okay, time to face the day." "You go girl." He said and sat up with her. He watched her gather her things, pull on her boots and stash the book in her bag. "The dish, hold on." He went to the kitchen and met her at the door. "Thank you for dinner, and breakfast," he said leaning in to kiss her gently, "and everything in between." "We should do it again sometime." "I have these papers to grade," "And I have to face my mom and see my son," "But tonight," "Eight o'clock?" "Your place." "My place." "I'll bring food." "Good man." She smiled, climbing on tiptoes to kiss him one last time, at least for now.

She had a nice lunch with Will, who was thrilled about the book, stroking its' glossy sleeve and the UFO hovering above the trees on it. "It's sold out everywhere, how did you get it?" "Had to pull some strings." "I bet you did," Will grinned wickedly and pulled on the collar on her shirt, revealing a bright pink bruise on her skin. "You're too young to know about that." She said, feeling the blush creep in as she swatted his hand aside. "About what?" Will smiled and the smile changed before her eyes. She knew them all, grins and smirks and beams and pouts, but now, with that wicked glint in his eye. "It's signed!" He exclaimed, before she could pin the thought down. "C'mon, he's your professor." "I couldn't ask for an autograph, that's embarrassing." "Well, good thing your mother isn't as proud." "I have the best mom," he said in a sing-song voice, hugging her tight for a brief second. "Now leave me, I want to read this." "You're crazy," she laughed. "Yup," Will grinned and opened the book and began to read.

Mulder showed up at 8, with a bag of Thai takeout and a six-pack of Shiner. "Damn, you're hot," she said, pulling him inside and straight into her arms, feeling him fumble with the bags and not giving a damn. "And you shaved," she grinned a moment later. "Well, you asked so nicely," he said and pulled her back in. "Okay, food first," she laughed surfacing and pushing him away, uselessly. "Hmmm, I dunno," Mulder mused, hands starting to roam. "You trust me?" "Yeah," "Then food first." He sighed, keeping her in his arms. "Fine, how's Will?" "He's fine, loved the book." "Happy to hear that." He stole a kiss and only then let her go. "And he's totally onto us," she said, taking the bag from him. Mulder chuckled, shrugging out off his jacket and following her into the kitchen. "Smart kid."

"How did this happen?" Scully mused stretched out on Mulders' chest, stomach full and every fibre of her body relaxed. "What happened?" "I know that my life may fall apart, that my son is in a hospital, hooked up to an IV, fighting for his life," she said, laying down her head on his shoulder, "but you make it all bearable, for the first time in weeks, I don't feel like I'm drowning." "I live to serve," he whispered, stroking her hair. "You'll get through this, both of you." "Can you promise me that?" "No, but I can help you believe." He said, completely honest and it was exactly what she needed to hear. "Will you stay tonight?" "I've got class at 10." "And I need to be at the hospital around 9." "So, what are we going to do with all that time?" "We'll think of something," she said and puled herself up to reach his mouth. Her last thought was that, between him and Will, she might need a longer couch.

The next morning, Scully sat in her car, waving Mulder goodbye as he drove off, when her phone pinged with an email notification.

From: [email protected] To: [email protected] Subject: URGENT good news Dr. Scully We need to talk. Meet me ASAP. Walter

She pulled out from the parking spot and all but stomped on the gas pedal.

#generous donation #x files fanfic #au #sweet nothings

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rmjagonshi · 5 years ago

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In For a Penny, In For a Pound - Chapter 2

On AO3

Stan had spent most of the morning puttering around on deck. Checking and double checking the tie downs for the anchor, fixing the guidewires for the antenna. Hell, he’d even mended the fishing net the seven-eyed shark had torn through two weeks back. Anything to avoid going below deck and facing his brother.

No matter what he did, no matter how many times he’d intentionally stuck his hand with a fishing hook, he just couldn’t get the memory out of his head.

It lingered on the edges of his mind, even now. The harsh breath, the throaty moans.

Stan flicked his eyes to the cabin window to check if he was alone before he adjusted himself, pausing a second too long to run the palm of his hand over the seam of his jeans. He wasn’t hard, not exactly, he couldn’t get hard again so soon after, not like he used to. But he’d been at half-mast since he’d scrambled out of the bathroom that morning and yanked his coffee cup out of Ford’ hand. The kicked puppy look Ford had given him certainly had done him no favors. Stan figured he deserved the burnt tongue he’d gotten from the scalding liquid when he’d guzzled the cup down.

He hadn’t even bothered to venture down to get something to eat when lunch time rolled around. His stomach grumbled at him as it digested air and bland coffee. But the thought of food made him queasy. And he wasn't ready to face Ford just yet. He could hardly think about his brother without his mind pulling up the memory from last might.

What’s even worse, was that he’d indulged in it. Instead of just leaving it a it was, he’d actually gotten off with the image of his twin in his mind. There was no way he could get around that. No way he could deny it. No amount of logic could make this ok. Knowing Ford, he’d try to write it off as some sort of psychology mumbo jumbo. At least…Stan thinks he would. He honestly doesn’t know what Ford would do.

Oh, GOD! What would Ford do if he found out? Suddenly, that kicked puppy look from this morning twisted into one of anger and disgust. Ford would leave. Or he would ask Stan to leave. They’d sail to the nearest port and Ford would leave him there. He’d lose his brother again. Third time’s the charm. This time it would be for good.

Stan’s fingers faltered over the knot he was tying in the ropes. His brother would leave. Everything he’d worked for would disappear. Ford would tell the kids. The kid’s parents would keep him from ever seeing to talking to them again. He couldn’t go back to Gravity Falls. Soos…god. What would Soos think of him? Soos had spent his entire adolescence looking up to Stan. Not that Stan was the best of role models, but Soos had forgiven much of Stan’s lackluster history. There was no way he would forgive this. If this fell apart, Stan didn’t even have the Mystery Shack to go back to. If this got out, it was all over. He would lose everything. He’d go back to living in his car under a shitty overpass. Back to the ‘nameless grifter’.

But it wouldn’t. He wouldn’t say anything. And he wouldn’t let this change anything. Stan was an old hat at ignoring his feelings. He could ignore this. He would just find some babe at the next port they stopped at to get his rocks off and this would go away. Everything would go back to normal. It was going to be okay. He’d claim that he was feeling off and needed some space to lick his proverbial wounds in peace. That was it. Ford would buy that. Stan always had a habit of hiding when he was hurt or bothered by something. It wasn't that abnormal. Yeah. He could play this off.

Stan took a breath and threw down the net he’d been working on. He needed to make amends. He could do this. Stan rose from the deck chair he had molded into over the past few hours. It was going on three in the afternoon. And he’d skipped lunch. Knowing his brother, Ford hadn’t eaten anything either. Man would go days without eating, subsisting on only coffee if someone didn’t shove food in front of his face. It had been a real problem through highschool. Stan had gotten into the habit of packing both of their lunches, making sure to cut the crusts of Ford’s sandwich everytime. Stan would usually find Ford tucked away in the library or studyhall and would drag him to the roof so they could eat together. On days Ford had resisted, they’d find a quiet corner in the library and eat there. Stan wondered how well Ford had taken care of himself in college.

Well, no time like the present to make amends. But his feet wouldn’t cooperate. He paced over to the railing to lean on it. They were listing off the north coast of Ireland. Ford was following some school of fish with toes on the end of their fins. Stan had caught one back near Iceland and they had been following them for the last week or so. Something about migration patterns or whatever. Stan didn’t pay much attention to his brother’s weird anomalies unless it was dangerous. He’d gotten enough of mundane weirdness in Gravity Falls.

It was pretty clear for November on the Atlantic. Sky partly cloudy with hints of sunlight peeking out from behind the fluffy grey wisps. It was a stupid dream of his, but when he was young and was laying on the beach with his brother, he’d always imagined flying up to the clouds to curl up in their softness. Being surrounded by the soft, puffy white cotton. He still imagined doing it, even all these years later. He knew that the clouds weren’t actually soft like cotton. He knew they really looked like fog up close, but he could still dream.

Stan sighed, closing his eyes and breathing in the crisp sea air. Alright. No more dawdling. He was a grown man. He could push his feelings aside to go and make up with his brother. He slapped the railing twice and walked over to the cabin door. Pushing it open, he could hear the beeps and boops from Ford’s computer array, the lights and screens flickering with sonar and radio printouts. The table pushed against the far wall was strewn with books and notes and maps. Ford had made the effort to keep record of everything they came across in their travels. He stayed up at all hours of the night to record his thoughts and experiments. He even went so far as to sneak a flashlight and notebook to bed. Stan a banned all notetaking in bed when they had to throw out a set of sheets when Ford’s pen had leaked all over.

That was another thing he was going to have to worry about. There wasn’t much in the way of clothes washing out in the middle of the ocean. They had a hot water tank and a crank washer in the engine compartment turned lab. He could always wait until they made port to do his laundry, but he didn’t fancy sleeping on a bare mattress for however long it took Ford to make up his mind about landfall. He hadn’t even bothered to check how bad the mess in his sheets was. Too busy having a moral crisis over his sexuality to even consider cleaning up.

Stan hoped Ford had left well enough alone, but he doubts it.

When he took the steps down to the galley, Stan was met with an empty room. Sink filled with two coffee mugs and a plate with crumbs. Table strewn with books and papers and a laptop computer sat open on Ford’s side of the booth. The bathroom was also empty, save for a stray pair of folded socks that Stan had missed putting on this morning. The bulkhead to the lab was closed and locked. Stan assumed that there wasn't much of a reason to check. Nothing but the low thrum of the modified engine (courtesy of McGucket and his brilliant engineering) and the mess of beakers and lab specimens Ford had saved.

Nothing left to check but their bedroom. Separated from the rest of the galley by a thin curtain, the bow of the ship housed two beds on either wall. Storage and footlockers the the far wall. Sure enough, when Stan hesitantly pushed the red weighted cloth aside, he caught sight of Ford napping in his bunk. Ford’s glasses were askew and resting on his forehead. A book was perched between Ford’s loose fingers and his nose. He was wearing a black t-shirt with a coral V-neck sweater pulled over it; forgoing the life-vest in favor of comfort. He wasn't snoring yet, so it was likely he’d only just dozed off.

Stan stood in the doorway, arm lifting the heavy curtain, and just looked. Mainly because he could. It still took him by surprise, even now, looking at his brother. That he was really there. That he was real. That those thirty years hadn’t been a waste. That the past summer hadn’t been a hallucination brought on by grief. Ford was real. He was safe. He was home. And Stan still marveled at that fact.

His eyes followed the line of Ford’s jaw not blocked by the book propped up by his nose. Swept over the creases at the corners of his eyes and over the faint scars on his fingers. Fluffy gray hair in disarray from sleep. Stan was filled with an alarming sense of affection. His chest swelled with it until he felt like it would burst. His brother was adorable. No other word for it. Stan’s adorable nerd brother. A soft smile worked its way onto Stan’s face. He’d work through whatever this was and they would go back to how it should be.

Stan eased into the room, letting the curtain swing closed behind him. He stooped over Ford’s bunk and pulled the book from his brother’s loose grasp. Ford’s hand twitched. A sharp inhale cut through the quiet room, and Ford’s eyes cracked open.

“Wha’sat? Oh. Stan. Mnh. Time issit?”

“Good morning to you too, sleepyhead. ‘Bout four. You eat yet?” Stan dog-eared the open page and closed the book to set it aside. He didn’t bother rummaging around for a bookmark. Ford mumbled something unintelligible and sat up, looking disoriented. He patted the mattress and the collar of his shirt looking for his glasses. Stan gave him another soft smile full of affection before reaching over and sliding them down over Ford’s eyes.

“Wha’ ah. Thanks. Ah…I had some toast this morning. And coffee.” Ford was fully awake now, sitting up straight and blinking up at Stan. Ford was analyzing him. Stan could practically see the lines of code running through his brother’s brain, cataloging every tick and minute detail. Stan hated it.

“So that’d be a ‘no’. Alright, how about I make fish tacos. Think we have some cheese and tortillas left. You said the ‘toe fish’ are edible and the freezer is full of the things.” Stan was trying to make amends. That didn’t mean he was ready to address the issue, but that he was willing to move past it. He really hoped Ford took the hint.

Ford adjusted his glasses, still peering up at Stan with a quizzical look on his face. “Ah, Yes. They are. Reasonably anyway. I haven’t tasted them yet, but I also haven’t detected any harmful compounds during my dissections either. My guess is that they simply are a phenotypic mutation resulting from over-development of the carpel…Stan!”

Stan snorted, pretending to wake up from loud and overdramatic snores. “Huh? Wha’? Sorry, Sixer, nerdtalk always makes me sleepy.” He grinned as Ford frowned and rolled his eyes. “Anyway, I’ll go start cookin’. You do whatever nerd things you do when I’m not around.”

Stan turned to leave the room again when he noticed the sheets on his bed were missing. The Comforter and bare pillow were neatly folded and placed in the center of the mattress, but the sheets and pillowcase were gone. Stan froze. He hadn’t cleaned-up, so the only other person who could have was now fidgeting behind him. This really wasn’t something he wanted to deal with. Sure, when they had been teenagers and it was laundry day, they’d tease eachother for having crusty sheets, but they weren’t sixteen anymore. And discussing it, even flippantly, was far too close to things Stan really wasn't wanting to deal with.

Ford’s hand fell in an awkward pat on his shoulder. “Hey. It’s fine. It’s actually a good sign. Men our age tend not to have the same vigor we do.” Ford chuckled, but it petered out quickly. The air between them practically tingled with awkward tension. Flashes from his morning fantasy changed the tone of Ford’s words. Made them more suggestive. He really needed to get out of the room and put some distance between them. Stan shrugged off Ford’s hand. “Heh, yeah. Thanks…uh. Sixer. I…um…I appreciate it. Sorry fer this morning.”

“Not a problem. I tossed out the leftovers from yesterday. But I don’t feel ill. How are you feeling now?” Ford was in his space, leaning in to scrutinize his face. Stan held his breath, feeling heat migrate to his cheeks. Ford pressed a cool hand to his heated forehead and frowned. “A bit warm. And you’re flushed. You really shouldn’t have been outside all day.” Six fingered hands drifted over his neck, gently palpitating his lymphnodes. Stan’s mind rang with an echoed moan and a phantom hand wrapped around his hardening dick. NOPE!

Stan took a step back, shaking his head and pushing Ford’s hands away from him. ‘I’m fine, Sixer. Damn! Just some indigestion. It happens. I’ll take care of the sheets after I cook dinner, Jeezus!” Ford flinched, drawing his hands to his chest. That kicked puppy look was back, but Stan wasn't in the mood to pet him and stroke his bruised ego. Ford was a grown man; he could deal with it. Stan flipped open the curtain and strode into the galley, fully intent on shoving all of this Freudian bullshit down under several layers of repression. He pushed up his sleeves and opened their little freezer to pull out two freaky toe fish. “Want anything else, or jus’ the tacos? Don’t know what we got left. Should make port soon, ‘less you wanna eat fish all the time.”

Ford followed after, hesitant and watchful. “Just tacos are fine. I think we have some instant guacamole in the back of the pantry.”

Stan groaned. “Eugh, instant. Remind me again why I chose to forgo modern conveniences to rough it on the water, again?” But there was no venom behind it. He’d already prepped their little oven to bake the fish, hacking away at the fins and doing his best to wedge the knife into the frozen flesh. He probably should have just thrown then in the oven to thaw, but he was impatient.

Ford grinned, feeling lighter now that the tension from before seemed to have dissipated. “Because I asked you to.” He passed by Stan to the sink to wash out their mugs, and filled the stovetop kettle.

“Yeah, and why on Earth would I do what a nerdbrain extraordinaire says?” Stan smiles, even as he tears out the goopy and slimy fish guts to toss in their chum bucket. Things felt light. Felt right. He could do this. This was how it was supposed to be between them. Easy and teasing. Just them being bros and living the high life on the high seas looking for treasure and babes. Definitely, definitely babes. And soon. Maybe a siren or a mermaid. Hell, he’d settle for a harpy if they could find one. He just needed to get this out of his system.

“Because you love me.” Ford nudged his arm, jostling Stan’s side.

Stan’s hands stuttered on the fish, narrowly avoiding slicing into his hand. “Heh. I dunno about that. ‘Love’ is a girly word fit for teenagers and woman pinning after Benedict Cumberbatch. Not for Pines men. But eh, I like ya well enough”

“Benedict Who?”

“Oh man. I forget you haven’t been around. Next time we call the kids, ask Mabel about him. He’s an actor she’s nuts over. Tall and lanky fella. Looks kinda like an alien.”

They both dissolved into laughter as the Stan O’ War II rode the waves of the North Atlantic.

#in for a penny in for a pound #Stancest #fanfiction

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snow-slayer · 5 years ago

Text

A Bunch of Good Things from 2019

*I don’t do things consistently, so there’s chunks of time I just forgot to write. So the blank spaces are days where I could not recall the exact good things that happened.*

January 1: Started the year off right by hanging out with @nah-young, eating some delicious leftovers from New Year’s Eve and working on a puzzle. Also caught a shiny Delibird in Pokemon Go as the first catch of the year. 2: Had a headache at work, but went home to take care of myself. Dad and I talked for a long time about money and taxes without arguing. I have also discovered a future hobby I want to get into: 3D printing. 3: I cranked out four solid hours of studying. I’m going to ace the Auditing section of the CPA exam. I feel it in my bones (especially when I finally stood up and stretched). 4: My ‘other mom’ (one of my best friend’s mom) took me out for a belated Birthday lunch to our favorite Thai food place, and I enjoyed more mango sticky rice. It’s one of my new favorite desserts. 5: Did some epic New Year cleaning. Caught up on laundry, filed away my 2018 paperwork, and did some 2019 taxes. Finally on top of things! 6: A puzzle day! I connected a big piece of the sky to the side on the Lion King puzzle. I’ve still got a lot to go, but progress is being made. 7: As usual, I both surprised and pleased the teller at the bank when I moved some money from savings into my IRA. They wanted to know if it was for tax year 2018, but I could tell them last year was maxed out and it was for 2019. 8: Got to practice my training and supervising skills with @arrowhearts. 9: Spent the night at Lucy’s (she’s a cat). She’s the sweetest cat though, and was cuddling in my lap for so long! She even held my finger with her paw for like ten minutes. I love her. 10: It’s been forever, but I finally sat down and played some video games. I’m replaying Arkham Asylum again and really just exploring every nook and cranny I can find. 11: Might have started a new Francis story line ... Whoops :) 12: Helped Jane clear an apartment and acquired many new tools and art supplies to use. 13: Snow! It was snowing before bed, but I still woke up at 5 am to about 4 - 5 inches. Activated my dad gene and started shoveling at 5:30 am (sorry neighbors to the house I was dog sitting at). It’s so pretty out! 14: A quiet day, but I did some work for Jane and gamed some more. Can’t wait to start Arkham City when I get 100% on Arkham Asylum! 15: I took my coworker a basket of fun snacks from Lotte for her Birthday. She’s so excited to try them all! 16: Donated blood today and when I went to get dinner on the way home, I got a free salad! The entree was already free and I ordered a side salad. I pulled out my wallet to pay, but the coupon covered it, too! 17: Treated myself to breakfast on the way into preschool (my new volunteer place since the teacher I followed to several elementary schools is now at). Also ate some amazing home cooked food for lunch with @nah-young before going out for ice cream. 18: Did some very early spring cleaning to prep for my next yard sale and straighten up a bit. 19: Beat the storyline and finished gathering all of Riddler’s trophies in Arkham Asylum. I do still need to finish up the additional content for 100% completion. 20: Working with Jane to help clean out an apartment again and got stencils to use for my art (the ones with shapes of different sizes). I had wanted to get me a set, so I really lucked out. 21: Started reading a book for fun. Lol, I forgot that I can still read non-accounting things for fun. 22: Sent out 1099s at work. It’s always a dreaded part of the year, but it’s taken care of! 23: I started uploading my old Franmouche stories to AO3. I forgot that I’d written 185 pages of them. At least if someone else likes my rarepair, they have lots to read. No guarantees on the quality, but there is quantity. 24: Made fun penguin cutouts for the preschool class I volunteer at. Then studied for nine hours on campus. A busy, yet productive day. 25: Finished watching all my lectures for the next portion of the CPA exam! So much auditing knowledge!!! 26: Panic alleviated. My check engine light had been on for a few days. Usually it’s just a gas cap issue so I was worried, but after readjusting the cap again (which usually fixes it) and an oil change, the light went out! 27: Played some Pokemon Go for four hours with @arrowhearts and Lyla. No Kyogre, but at least we each got a Groudon. Plus, the weather was beautiful for this time of year. 28: I found a dollar today while sweeping the parking lots with my dad! I’m gonna be riding this wave for a week. (Fun fact: my dad and I used to go bike riding on Sunday afternoons/evenings in the local parking garages and look for pennies. We’d always get bragging rights when we found a quarter or more. We still get excited and tell each other of the day’s finds when we find a few coins while we’re sweeping). 29: Had a bit of a headache, but managed to get through it so I could finish the workday. Then I get some well deserved rest. 30: Met up with @nah-young for some fries and ice cream! 31: My annual physical went well! Took care of a couple test we’ve been putting off, too, and they weren’t quite as bad as I thought they’d be.

February

1: I had such a productive day in the office, even for a Friday. Special thanks to @arrowhearts for helping me move all (24 years worth) of our files. 2: Started off the day a little rough and feeling low, but I decided to go up to campus, and I’m so glad I did. I was able to help a bunch of people get to their destination. Also hung out with @nah-young and @arrowhearts in a sketchy room. 3: Technically today (starting at 1 am). Had a great talk with @nah-young about a lot of things including our friendship. Successfully avoided the Super Bowl (which I heard sucked, so that was a good use of my time). 4: Had a really good conversation with my dad for almost an hour. We had some fights earlier in the year, but it was nice to be able to connect some. 5: It’ll be silly to look back on, but I thought I lost a reference letter for a scholarship applicant, but realized I could find it on our shared drive. Such a relief! 6: I tried Duck Donuts for the first time today. One of our board members brought me and a coworker a half dozen each. 7: Caught a Miltank in Pokemon Go! I thought I missed my chance, but there was a special running, so I got it. 8: Just heard we got a new boss at work, so it’ll be nice to be full staffed again. 9: Started working on a painting for @arrowhearts. It might be my first completed artwork of the year. 10: A lazy day, but I flipped through a book on home decorating. You know, to plan for my future house. 11: Officially started working for Jane’s business. We’ll see how it goes, but at least it’s an extra couple of hours per week. 12: Finished a dog sitting job, and I’m super thankful to be sleeping in my own bed again. 13: I gave Lucy, the sweetest cat ever, a piggyback ride and it was the cutest thing ever. I was on my knees and forearms trying to get Lucy to boop my nose when she just climbed on my back and sat down. I rose up on my knees and hands and she did the “i’m not so sure but I’m going to stay here” stand and let me crawl across the floor a while before finally jumping off. I love this cat. 14: Took the auditing section of the CPA exam. I feel much better about this one than I have about the other two. We’ll see on the 26th. 15: Such a busy day at the office! It was productive, but just a lot of work. 16: Even though I just too the other exam, I managed to get a lot of studying done. 17: Mamaw and I got to chat and work on the puzzle for a while. It was nice to hang out with her since I haven’t done son in quite a while. 18: We had some really good food at our investment club meeting today. Sheppard’s pie (like meat and mashed potatoes), salad, this great cracker dip (I have no other details other than feels like sharp cheddar finally shredded with a hint of spice in some sort of sauce). 19: Our new executive director started today. I think I made a pretty good first impression! 20: Started playing Arkham City again. We had a snow day and even my office closed, so I made the most of my day. 21: Lol and today I finished the main storyline of Arkham City. Accidentally, because I was doing side quests, but Batman got mad when I tried to go finish some before the last mission. 24: I am obsessed with Excel, but I figured out a formula so that it would total certain categories even if they weren’t in order. Plus I learned how to make a drop down menu (on two versions of Excel). Guess who’s budget looks beautiful! 25: I caught a Latias in Pokemon Go. Not having much luck with the water legendaries. I wonder if they don’t like me because we picked the grass starter. 26: I passed the Auditing section! (and instead of keeping it quiet, I made a point to tell some people). Then @nah-young and I went to dinner to celebrate our successes of the day and just have a nice chat. 27: Good news: I starved off a migraine that was starting on Feb 26. Maybe this new method will help them from getting bad. Just took an Aleve with some hot tea. 28: Went on a Pokemon run, and I found $20 blowing across the yard when I got home! A nice find for the year.

March 1: I’ve been really getting into “Ghost Story” by Peter Straub and had so much time to just sit and read while it rained. 2: I watched “Spiderman: Enter the Spiderverse” today. An epic movie and I highly recommend it! I also have several new costume ideas... 3: Officially started working on my Library Comic Con cosplay. There’s not much to show, but it was nice to start costuming again. 4: Hiked up to the nearby bubble tea. It was good! I got a mango green tea creama. Next time I know I have to mix it up before I start drinking it. 5: 6: 7: 8: 9: 10: Started replaying Castlevania IV. It’s been a while since I beat it, so hopefully I can still finish it! 11: I have proven myself an Excel deity. Well, at least Jane thinks though. She needed a spreadsheet for something and had some ideas so I whipped it out in five minutes flat with a bunch of formulas she didn’t even know were possible. I’m quite proud of it. 12: Lol, speaking of excel, I was geeking out over my budget with one of our board members. She was showing me how she built her itinerary in excel for her next trip and I got to show off my budget. 13: 14: 15: It was fake St. Patrick’s day at work, so I got to show off my green Riddler suit. Apart from being mistaken as dressing like a leprechaun a few times, I received a bunch of compliments on it. I’ve gotten a lot of use out of that suit jacket. 16: Tagged along with @nah-young to her grandfather’s birthday party and watched Bohemian Rhapsody. Apart from the timeline inaccuracies, I really enjoyed it! Look at that: two new movies in one month. 17: First big leaf job of the season. I guess the first major landscaping job. Dad helped out, so it made life easier. 18: Investment club meeting went well, and I ended up staying late to chat and help clean up, but it was enjoyable. Also had some great tiramisu from Trader Joe’s. 19: 20: 21: It was a downpour today, but I also made a 20 minute Costco run. Parking was great, the lines were short, and I managed to balance everything without a cart. Success! 22: Finally got around to doing invoices. It’s such a weight off my chest to take care of them. 23: I had the house to myself, so got ample studying done, played some pokemon, and treated myself to some bubble tea. Got myself a bunch of good pokes from Community day. 24: Another lovely day to sit and hang out with @nah-young. I always enjoy our hour long conversations just sitting in my car in her driveway. I also finished the lectures for the BEC portion of the CPA exam. 25: I found a gift card loaded with $30 today. It had been thrown into the dumpster, so a little gross, but it washed off nicely. 26: Ran up to the local library to turn in my books (look @arrowhearts, I did it the day before they were due and didn’t have to make a midnight run). I wasn’t going to check out more books since I already had some checked out from another library visit (I go to many branches due to my job and often check out a book or two, resulting in cycles of books due at different times), but I did anyway. I started reading Area X, too, and so far, I’m really enjoying it. 27: Our family’s accountants think I’m a bit weird because I was so excited to get my tax papers back even though I owed money. I was just like “cool!” to all the facts and things on my sheets, which is apparently not what they’re used to, but one of the new tax laws works in my favor as small business income is taxed at a lower rate or something. 28: 29: 30: I love Annihilation in the Area X series! I haven’t plowed through a book that fast in years. 31: I was catching up on my business spreadsheets and it turns out I had the most profitable March since I started my business :)

April 1: No April Fools jokes, which is always a huge plus. 2: 3: 4: Took the BEC section of the exam and then clocked in a bunch of hours for the Foundation. Jubilee is almost here!!! 5: 6: The Jubilee is over!!! What a relief! A lot of things went well, and I heard it was a lot of people’s favorite. Not sure what actually happened because I was stationed at check in/out all night, but hopefully the silent auction results are good. Huge shout out to @arrowhearts and @nah-young for getting me through the night! 7:A quiet morning of returning the Jubilee to the Foundation. Plus some other landscaping. 8: I know everyone at work is saying I should take time off, and I didn’t, but I’m actually feeling blessed that I have the physical and mental stamina to keep working on things. Plus, I need to catch up with post Jubilee stuff. 9: 10: 11: 12: 13: 14: 15: 16: 17: 18: 19: Got to talking with my art dealer for a long while and we exchanged headcannons and ideas. 20: Had a nice Pokemon run with @arrowhearts‘ dog. Plus, enough work to keep me out of trouble X) 21: A very busy Easter. I moved a huge mound of mulch. It was half the size of my car. Hopefully the home owner will like it. 22: 23: 24: 25: 26: 27: 28: 29: 30: 31: I’ve been feeling behind, but I finally knocked out a really important thing at work today. Got our annual applications in!

May 1: 2: 3: My gauntlets for my comic con costume look so cool! They’re a little stabby (there’s staples on the inside, although I should be able to tape it down for safety), but overall look cool for a first draft. 4: A long day, but I feel like I was really able to help my friend and her family, which is nice considering how much they do for me. 5: The event that happened wasn’t good, but I’ve been humbled as to how well our house was kept and motivated to try and become more organized. 6: Dad and I were chatting today, and we could even touch on topics in a civil manner. It was quite nice! 7: Just found out I passed the BEC section of the CPA exam! I’m 75% CPA!!! And no cavities were found after my dentist appointment :) 8: Frantically working on my costume, but my head piece looks really good! 9: Mom even chipped in to help. We rigged up a steampunk mask I have (which doesn’t fit on my head right) so that I can actually wear it. 10: I’ve been fasting for Ramadan and I think my body and I are finally on the same page. It was a rough start this year, but I’m looking forward to focusing on being thankful for what I have and working on self discipline. 11: Library Comic Con! My costume is a bit rough, so no final pictures, but I have plans to make it better! 12: It was a busy Sunday. Lots of lawns, but thankfully the weather was cool. 13: 14: 15: 16: 17: Had a nice meeting with my boss. I keep feeling like I’m not on top of things or she’s disappointed, but that doesn’t seem to be the case. Plus, she said I did great at the finance committee meeting, so that was nice. 18: Although I scared everyone I worked with all day, I was able to donate blood even though I had been fasting. 19: I saw the tiniest inch worm while I was pulling weeds today. It was more like a quarter inch worm and it was just trying so hard to climb up my arm when I found it. I also saw the first lightening bugs of the year. As a bug type Pokemon trainer, I’m quite pleased with all of this (less so with the mosquitoes though, as I got my first bite of the season). 20: I have found a nice way to keep cool at the property Dad and I work at. I’m allowed to douse my head, neck, and hat with the hose, and man does it feel good! 21: I received many compliments at the executive committee meeting for all my hard work on the budget, the Jubilee, and finance committee. 22: Caught up on reconciliations at work (finally). It’s been just a nightmare, but I’m happy they’re done. 23: Another me day. I’ve been taking Thursdays off and got to game for a bit but also accomplish a lot of laundry and studying. 24: Had a good meeting at work to discuss the future of the nonprofit I work at. Plus I finally made a phone call I didn’t want to make. 25: Went to a foam helmet making class with a coworker. I’m super excited to start trying out this style, and I think the sample we made in class can easily be used to make a helmet for Vile. Might have purchased a few things to go with it :) 26: Found a new drink that I love from Kung Fu Tea! Also got to rewatch Coco, which is always good. 27: Part of my afternoon spent working with Jane was changing her screen saver. It was set up for one photo of pictures, but some were so fuzzy, so we set up new pictures and I got to add my fuzzball to the reel. 28: I visited one of Jane’s friends to discuss dog sitting and we had such a nice conversation afterwards. 29: I found a four leave clover today while mowing lawns. It’s been years since I’ve found one, so that was exciting. 30: I plowed through about 6 hours of studying for the FAR portion of the CPA exam. Only two more lectures and then onto multiple choice! 31: Filled out a form at work (finally). Now I just have to hope my boss will sign it and have it notarized.

June 1: 2: 3: 4: 5: 6: Took the (hopefully) last CPA exam. It was nice as I spoke to an elevator engineer before the exam and it helped to calm my nerves a bit. 7: 8: 9: 10: 11: 12: 13: 14: Wasn’t sure what day to put this on, but @nah-young and I hung out for hours just sitting and chatting on the cats’ back porch. 15: Successfully navigated into DC with the help of @arrowhearts (and had an interesting laugh about her being my son...? Oh well, at least we got to give the people sitting outside a show as we left the building with two rollie office chairs each). 16: Started working on my Halloween costume. I’ve abandoned the idea I originally had and will be switching to a different Mega Man X character (fun fact: it was a costume I originally intended to make before being introduced to Scaramouche back in 2017) 17: It was a scorcher, but had a slurpee for the first time in almost a year. I’m so thankful for the 7-11 within walking distance of where my dad and I work on Mondays. 18: I’ve officially passed the CPA exam! Now onto the next steps... 19: I have been struggling with telling people good news, but I did make an effort to inform some people about me passing the exam. 20: Told some more people about the CPA exam and just trying not to stress. I got celebratory milkshakes for my family after dinner. 21: My coworkers are so sweet. They brought me in a cake and we had a mini celebration. 22: 23: 24: 25: 26:Found a praying mantis while mowing. She kept standing where I wanted to mow, so I got to pick her up and put her somewhere safe (with lots of snacks for her!) 27: 28: 29: So glad I went to see Detective Pikachu with @nah-young and @arrowhearts! I really enjoyed it! 30: 31:

July 1: A new fiscal year! I did manage to get a good bit done on my latch hook. 2: A sudden thunderstorm took me off the weed pulling job early (i.e. a perfect opportunity to read). 3: It was quiet in the office. Too quiet ... yet super productive! I processed so many gifts and letters. 4: I don’t really celebrate, and spent a lot of it working, but played some pokemon in the rain. It was a warm day, so the cool rain felt so refreshing! 5: A jammed packed day with trashrooms, a bank run, and more pokemon quests! I completed another 15 and hatched a new pokemon. Plus I finished another book: Dr. Death. 6: A busy day, but I was able to finish everything so I can take the next day off completely (for once). Again, apologies to @arrowhearts for dragging you out and getting caught in a downpour so I could get some bubble tea! 7: 8: 9: 10: Unboxed my unicycle! Not sure when I’ll ride, but it’s ready when I am. 11: 12: 13: 14: The vanity is back in my bathroom! Dad’s renovating it, and it’s been a slow process, but I finally have a sink! 15: 16: 17: 18: 19: 20: Spent a few hours working on cleaning the basement, and I’m finally seeing some of the fruits of my labor. 21: 22: 23: 24: Officially finished the Vile helmet! 25: Just started a new dog sitting job, and the house is right on top of a pokestop. Guess I’m going to have a full item bag again! 26: Finally got myself a memory stick for my PSP. I’m replaying the Maverick Hunter X game ... because I can! 27: Got three team rocket grunts in one day at the one stop. 28: Plowed through the Vile portion of Maverick Hunter X. Lol, I probably make it harder on myself since I only use my favorites, regardless of if they’re good against the boss. 29: Had a huge crab and shrimp dinner at Jane’s house. 30: Hung out and ate delicious homemade butter chicken with my best friend’s mom (she’s basically like my other mother). We laughed and chatted, showed off our latest projects, probably kept the neighbors up, and just had a good time until like 2 in the morning. 31: Welp, it wasn’t a raid day for armored Mewtwo, but @arrowhearts and I did defeat more Team Rocket Go grunts in the rain.

August 1: Chatted with @nah-young for a few hours and I’ve got a new place to eat on my radar! 2: I kept feeling like I was letting my boss down because I couldn’t answer her questions/didn’t understand, but she insisted I was handling myself well, and found the information she needed later. Plus, she’s very complimentary of my work and appreciates my transparency and work ethic, both of which I work hard on and value. 3: 4: 5: 6: 7: 8: 9: 10: 11: 12: 13: 14: 15: 16: 17: 18: 19: 20: 21: 22: 23: 24: 25: 26: 27: 28: 29: 30: 31:

September 1: 2: 3: It’s official! We’re having a Halloween party at work. If my new schedule turns out, I’ll be at work on that day and will show off a costume. Not sure if it will be the one I’m working on, but I can always recycle an old one. 4: 5: 6: 7: 8: 9: 10: 11: 12: 13: 14: 15: I had such a good ripstik run. @nah-young and I practiced for a good while yesterday (and she did her first trick, too!). I guess it’s nice to see the fruits of our practice since we’ve been working off and on for about a month. 16: Had the investment club meeting at my house. I didn’t get to cook everything, but I picked the recipe and it turned out well! 17: I finished “Every Tool’s a Hammer” by Adam Savage (from Mythbusters) and I really recommend it. It’s such a great book for anyone who makes or creates. It’s a fun read and chocked full of helpful hints. 18: I decided to start reading the Naruto series. I’m enjoying it so far! Now I just have to wait for the next to volumes to be available from the library. 19: I started replaying Scooby Doo and the Cyber Chase. It’s amusing, although I’m a little rough. 20: 21: 22: 23: I’d been on the fence about taking a vacation early next year because I want to save up for a down payment, but after talking to my dad, I decided I’d do a little something. I still need to work out the plans (and make sure the people I want to visit are free), but I’m looking forward to it! 24: 25: 26: There’s a chance I might be going full time at my office job, so dad encouraged me to take the day off from trash rooms. I still got up early, but knocked out a bunch of chores, finished Scooby Doo and the Cyber Chase, finished a drawing, and cleaned in the basement a bit. 27: Lol, I just realized I have three cycles of books checked out again. I started reading The Wicked Years series. I’m trying to set aside time each night so I can read a chapter or two before bed. 28: I made the pattern for my gauntlets! I’m actually trying to do it the right way and making measurements, creating an accurate template, and just generally taking my time. 29: Part 2 of the gauntlets: They’re made! My template worked and I spent a couple of hours slowly forming and shaping them. I still need some practice on the gluing component, but at least they feel sturdy. 30: Started replaying DK 64 again. I really love this game. Besides Gauntlet Legends, it’s probably my favorite N64 game we own. 31: Got rained out at work, but managed to take it easy in the afternoon and just generally keep ahead with laundry.

October 1: Today officially marks the first day of working full time at my office job. They added ten hours a week, so now I’m working 4 days at 10 hours each. It’ll take a little adjusting. I’m happy for the extra hours! 2: I sent out invoices on time for once! 3: It was my fuzzball’s 16th Birthday today! Someone also brought in some really yummy snacks to work that were leftover from a meeting. I also managed to create templates for the leg gauntlets and cut them out of foam. I’m just rolling with the motivation now, and would like to have Vile finished by Halloween (keep reading to find out if it was finished). 4: Really just having a good time playing DK 64. Knocked out Gloomy Galleon, so all that’s left are my favorite levels! 5: 6: 7: I have leg gauntlets formed. Lol, I guess I should look up the name... All that’s left is the chest plate and cape! 8: I lucked out! My coworker can’t go to a book signing even this weekend and asked me to get her book signed since I’m going. It was the perfect opportunity to get my hands on a copy of “Where the Crawdads Sing” which I wanted to read before this weekend. 9: Making some headway on the costume again! Arm and leg gauntlets have the plating and base coat of plastidip. 10: I finished “Where the Crawdads Sing” within 48 hours of having it my possession. That’s such a huge accomplishment to read something so quickly and eagerly! 11: I was plowing through my to do list at work. I knocked out 11 items. Woo! 12: 13: 14: 15: 16: 17: 18: 19: 20: 21: 22: 23: 24: 25: 26: 27: 28: 29: 30: My Halloween costume is finished *gasp* before Halloween! Barely, but it counts. 31: I won the most creative costume at work! Well, tied for first, but that’s cool.

November (whoops, I really forgot to write this month) 1: 2: 3: 4: 5: 6: 7: 8: 9: 10: 11: 12: 13: 14: 15: 16: 17: 18: 19: 20: 21: 22: 23: 24: 25: 26: 27: 28: 29: 30: 31:

December 1: 2: 3: 4: 5: 6: 7: 8: 9: 10: 11: 12: My coworker is back! She had been on extended leave for a while, but now she’s back. She bring such a positive and fun attitude to the workplace. 13: 14: I’m officially 25! I worked a few hours in the rain, but got a lot done (and saw Lucy, my favorite cat I cat sit). Instead of going to a steakhouse for dinner, which I’m not a fan of, we ended up going to somewhere I did enjoy. Overall, it was a nice and quiet celebration. 15: 16: 17: I finished the Naruto series today! It was a good series, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. Going to take a manga break to work on a few novels I have checked out and then decide which series to start. 18: 19: A busy day again. Knocked out two leaf clients for the year and went to see three bands perform at a local music club. I stayed out way too late, but had a great time hanging with a friend, one of the performers, and the performer’s friend. 20: 21: 22: 23: 24: Hung out with my brother and grandmother. I crushed them in several games! 25: Went to my coworkers in the afternoon and dueled for the first time in quiet a while. They wiped the floor with me, but I had fun with my deck destruction deck. 26: 27: Ended up hanging out with Jane for a while and just chatting about everything. We’re seeing eye to eye on a lot of things, so it was nice. 28: Finished my leaf jobs for the year! Time to relax. 29: 30: 31: Welp, ended up being sick and missing out on the intended New Year plans. I guess I did start the year with a migraine, so here I am ending it with one. After I rested up, I did start playing my favorite video game. Plus, I frantically read “Hey, Kiddo!” before the end of the year

Notable stuff

Highlights: Passed the CPA exam Officially hired full time

Books read: “Ghost Stories” “Every Tool’s a Hammer” “Where the Crawdads Sing” “Wicked” Naruto series “Hey, Kiddo!”

Movies watched: Spiderman: Enter the Spiderverse Mary Poppins 2 The Princess and the Frog Pokemon Lucario

#2019 in review #2019 #a year in review

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leftwriteb · 6 years ago

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Retail Tales [Part 2] - When Nintendo Fans Turned Detective On Me

In the run up to the release of the Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, Nintendo fans were working themselves up into such a state that it was almost dangerous. A few days before the game was due to be released, the stock arrived at our store. Thinking nothing of it and eagerly awaiting the chance to play it in a WiiU I had borrowed from my brother for no other reason, I posted a little tease in anticipation of the game on my Instagram. What a mistake that was.

As you can see from the photo above, it was a pretty harmless image. From the attached caption on my post you’d assume it was fairly obvious I hadn’t acquired a copy myself and was simply eagerly waiting for those last few days to tick by so I could pick up from where I’d left off at the event I’d been lucky enough to attend a few months prior. I, like so many others, could not wait to see more of Breath of the Wild.

Except, to those without the right context, this post could have been (and indeed was) misconstrued to the point where you might think I’d acquired a copy early. I still argue it’s unlikely, but you could see how someone could make that mistake. As I left for my lunch break at work that day I had no idea how many people would assume exactly that, and how quickly the post would explode and circulate. I came back from my lunch to find over 100 notifications. Nintendo fanatics had found me.

At the time of the post, as well as at the time of writing, I was working at a videogames store and understandably our stock for the game had arrived a few days earlier to ensure delivery upon release and so we could allocate our preorders with time to spare. Staring at the stacks of games on Switch and WiiU, I could feel the excitement getting to me. What was the harm in posting a little photo to help try and ease that enthusiasm? Well let’s look at what happened in the course of a few hours and then the few days that followed. Naturally, most of the comments and notifications were tied to the Instagram post itself.

Things started off nice enough: a few messages from fans just as excited as myself. Nicer still was a friend request from some other Nintendo fan. Then you have the understandable enquiries about where I’d got the game from, this being maybe three days before the game was supposed to be on store shelves. Then, as you can see, things started to be cranked up a notch. Fans, if you want to call them that anyway, began asking me to use the WiiU disc I supposedly had in my possession to upload the files and game content online, allowing people to datamine and potentially pirate the game early. It’s not hugely surprising given the intense furore some people were getting into before the release, but what really struck me was how quickly these comments had surfaced. In only a matter of minutes someone had found my post and made the request.

And once the first ticket dump request came in, further requests followed. The same chap that had asked about where I’d apparently got a copy had followed things up to further stress the importance of helping them out. Before a third request had come in, a delightful chap had decided to go the route of name calling because I’d somehow angered him by not complying, despite my lack of comments altogether. While I deny the claims I’m a “moralfag”, he was right in that I wouldn’t have uploaded all the files even if I had the option to. Of course, this was followed up by a little damage control from another fan in an attempt not to dissuade me from helping them all out.

I chose not to comment on any of it. Perhaps it would have been easier just to set the record straight but, in the interest of both my job and my curiosity, I remained quiet. I wasn’t able to upload the files because I didn’t have the game yet. Even if I had, doing so would have been a huge mistake and would have meant stealing from my place of work. On top of that, if I had done so and gotten away with it I would have likely faced consequences from Nintendo because doing so would’ve been flagged so quickly. And, on top of all of this, I didn’t want to betray the team of developers and other staff who had worked so hard on the game. To have put years of time and effort into a project only to have all its secrets leaked early in such a seedy way, without the right context no less, would have been a huge disservice to them and gamers around the world.

But nope, it didn’t end there. I was never even considering doing what they had asked but when I served these fans a dead end, they decided to build the pressure further. As the Instagram well ran dry, I then received a good few messages on my Twitter profile like the one below.

Somehow this little post had ended up becoming a topic of discussion on 4Chan. This warning was arguably maybe a little overblown, I thought. It was a little weird to think that, out of everything, my little post had somehow gained traction online and there was very little more I could expect, as far as I could tell. The logical conclusion was that some fans were a little obsessive and with my Instagram and Twitter accounts both using the same handle, it didn’t exactly take a genius to find my Twitter profile. There were a few extra steps needed if they wanted to bombard me further and these were steps they evidently were happy to take.

Mulling it over, I’m pretty sure I figured out the path these fans took to message me elsewhere and while it’s not exactly tricky it is still a little alien to me that many people took time out of their day to try and get hold of me just in the slim chance I’d help them get access to a game only a few days early. My Twitter contained a link to what was the predecessor to this site; a Tumblr blog. This blog got a good handful of messages just like those previously, asking me to lend them a hand on their misguided adventure.

On this blog was a link to a social area that linked people to my usernames on various gaming platforms. Once they’d found this page, they than began messaging me on Xbox Live, PSN, Steam, DeviantArt and more. No matter what avenue was available, they made sure pretty much every account I had would have messages, requests and (in one instance anyway) slightly vulgar voice messages. Call it passion, obsession or toxicity, it was all a little weird. Thankfully there was some positivity sprinkled within there too!

By the end of it all I’d amassed around 120 notifications across various platforms. Most of which were in the space of the first few hours but the odd one would pop up in the remaining days before the release. This, of course, doesn’t include any other areas I don’t know about; I never investigated 4chan and, for all I know, talk of it may well have spread to Reddit or NeoGaf forums as well. I don’t quite know the extent of how far it spread other than the information available to me and maybe I don’t want to know.

The release of the game came and went and the whole thing slipped to the wayside, but it was an eye-opening moment and one that’s stayed with me since. Random people across the globe effectively stalked me, in a way. Bizzare.

So there you have it. In the space of a few hours I’d had lord knows how many strangers bombard me with messages and demands, all because they had wrongly assumed something. In an age where reviewers and developers are bombarded with harassment, it’s easy to see how something as little as this can spread, let alone something far more large in scale and scope. It’s interesting really given that it’s hard to tell what motives were in play; greed, intrigue, jealously, excitement, or something else. All I know is that some Nintendo fans and Zelda fans don’t mind turning detective if it means they might get their hands on the tiniest slithers of a Nintendo product early. Nice try, folks. It’s a good thing I never said anything when Nintendo let us buy their last Super Smash Bros. game early back in 2014. Sitting in college playing that before it was released sure was fun…

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lesbiancouplescounseling · 4 years ago

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Many of the lesbian clients I talk to are desperate to save their relationship. But their partner wants nothing to do with getting help, or even changing what she’s doing that’s contributing to the problems. Sometimes their wife has just said, I’m not in love with you anymore.

I tell those women (and I’m telling you) it doesn’t matter. You can save your marriage alone!

Breathe that in for a second.

I guarantee that you can change your relationship if you’re the only one trying. Even if your wife is disconnected, angry, complacent, or threatening to leave.

It’s true. One person can change a marriage, alone.

How good does it feel to find out that you can turn your relationship around, even if your partner is being stubborn and withdrawn? What will it mean to you to save your relationship and make it thrive?

Hold onto that feeling. It will help you make the shifts within yourself that can save your marriage.

Let me be clear — I’m not suggesting that everything wrong with your relationship is your fault. Or that you’re the only one that needs to change in order to have a great marriage.

Ultimately, you’ll both have to do some things differently in order to create an awesome, secure and happy relationship.

But here’s the thing…

Someone has to start! If you’re in pain about the state of your relationship, put on your big girl panties and become the leader of change. Don’t wait for your wife or partner to make changes first.

Do you really want to save your relationship?

Then start a positive feedback-loop by being brave and doing a few things differently. The key is to make a few simple shifts in order to disrupt the vicious cycle you two are stuck in.

You know the saying…you can’t keep doing the same things over and over and expect to get different results.

To get out of the pain of a disconnected or hostile relationship, you’ll have to change some of the ways you typically react. You may have to get uncomfortable, shake up your habits, and take a risk.

Three inner shifts that can save your relationship:

1. TAP INTO YOUR WHY

This is an important first step which starts in your head and heart. I invite you to take a few minutes to thoroughly answer this question: Why do I want to save my relationship?

Getting super clear on WHY you want to stay together will help you hang onto the motivation to make the necessary changes moving forward.

So ask yourself…Why do I want to remain in this relationship? How will it benefit me?

Is it because you made a promise? Because it’s too expensive to break up? Because you’re better together than alone? Or is it that you want to become the happiest couple you know?

How will it benefit you to be in this relationship when it’s thriving?

Will you feel joy, have more fun, feel safe, enjoy growing old together?

Now, grab a piece of paper and a pen. At the top of the page, write this question: Why do I want to save my relationship and how will it benefit me?

Then write down all of the reasons that pop into your head. Make an exhaustive list.

Once you’ve written out all aspects of your WHY, put the paper in a safe place. Next time you feel discouraged about putting effort into your relationship, pull out the paper and remind yourself of your WHY.

And for now, I want you to stay focused on your WHY as you move into the next couple of inner shifts.

2. STOP FOCUSING ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP PROBLEMS

This might seem backwards to you. But trust me, it isn’t. In order to save your marriage, it’s important that you take the focus off of the problems, off your relationship troubles.

In order to fix the recurring issues, you’ve got to stop fussing about them. And yo must stop talking to your partner about all the things that are wrong.

Here’s how I suggest you make this shift:

Stop talking to your wife about your marriage problems

Do not tell her anything she’s doing wrong

Avoid blaming your partner

Don’t nag her about what she should do differently

Quit complaining to your friends every time you have a fight

Looping on the problems, endlessly analyzing the unhealthy patterns, rehashing the arguments, blaming your wife for everything that’s wrong, and focusing on the negative— these are actually keeping you stuck.

Take a break from those habits and see what happens. You’ll be pleasantly surprised.

When you start to worry about and focus on your marital problems, redirect your thinking instead. Here are a few ways you can do that:

Write out 3 things that you appreciate about your partner today

Sing a song loudly

Go for a walk

Crank up your favorite tunes and dance your heart out

Call a fiend (but don’t talk about your problems)

Take 10 slow, deep breaths

These types of self-care actions are simple to do. And they will help you relax, be more creative, see what’s going right, discover hidden solutions, and get clarity on what you really desire.

3. DO THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT YOU’VE BEEN DOING

It’s time to do a 180! You need to stop engaging in the same old reaction to being worried about your marriage.

Most of the time, when couples are distressed, they each respond in one of two ways. Some people tend get more clingy to their partner, and others become distant and withdrawn.

Which do you do?

Are you constantly pursuing your partner or are you trying to get time and space away from her?

In either case, it will be most helpful to shift into doing the opposite of what you normally do.

If your reflex is to cling to your wife when there’s trouble brewing, I want you to have the courage to take a giant step back. You’ll know that you’re a pursuer if in times of trouble you try to get your partner to talk, seek affection, want to spend more time together, feel anxious when she’s upset with you, or always insisting on date night.

Now, I’m not saying to leave the relationship or go stay at a hotel.

In fact all I want you to do right now is take a deep breath and focus on yourself without doing anything.

Tell the part of you that feels little and is scared of being abandoned that she’s going to be ok. Let that part of you know that by taking a step back, you’ll end up getting more of what you want.

If you’ve been in the clingy, pursuer roll, just loosen the grip. You don’t have to let go. Some ways to do that are to take yourself on a mini adventure such as:

get a new book to read

go to lunch with a safe friend

take a yoga class

go for a walk

enjoy a bubble bath

call a friend you haven’t talked to in a long time

meditate

write in your journal

resume a hobby

The most important thing is that you loosen the death grip that you have on your partner. I promise, it’s driving her bananas!

On the other hand, if you’re the partner that’s been distancing and withdrawing from your honey, I want you to step in and move back towards her. I get that you’re afraid she’s going to make you feel like everything you do is wrong. But staying isolated and detached isn’t helping resolve your problems.

Start by taking a deep breath and having a little chat with the part of yourself that’s afraid of being overwhelmed, smothered, or judged by your partner. Tell that protective part of yourself that you can still get alone-time when you need it.

Now that you’ve soothed that part of yourself, lean into your courage and move toward your wife. Seriously!

It’s time to start reconnecting and engaging with your partner again. You don’t have to be connected every minute of the day. But find one thing to do every day that will move you in the direction of you wife.

Some ways you can move toward her are:

hold hands on a walk

take her on a date offer to cook dinner together

send her a couple of out-of-the-blue texts when you’re at work

talk about your days

surprise her by playing “your song” and dancing in the living room

give her a long welcome home hug

tell her you miss her

cuddle on the couch

exchange shoulder or foot massages

Now that you know how to save your marriage alone with 3 simple shifts, I encourage you to get started right away.

If you’re relationship is too entrenched in unhealthy patterns, you may need some expert help to get unstuck. We’re here to help. Our lesbian relationship coaching program may be the perfect fit for you.

#lesbian couples counseling #lesbian relationships

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sweet-star-cookie · 6 years ago

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Stolen again aha

1. Describe and inside joke with little to no context

“Bean”, “Muffin”, “Noodle”, “Cinnamon Roll” and “Star-shaped Sugar Cookie” are all terms that have been used to describe me in any given situation. It’s like a bakery up in here.

2. Describe something that makes you happy

Finishing a piece of art and feeling really happy rather than doubtful about it after, or finding something new to completely lose myself in, like a new game or TV show. Both are really good feelings, especially if I can share with my friends.

3. What’s the funniest joke you know by heart?

Myself.

... Too soon?

I actually don’t consider myself that humorous so I have no idea what to put here, sadly. I wish I was funnier in a linguistic sense but outside of sarcasm and my reactions to things I’ve got nothing. My friends seem to find entertainment in it though. Entertainment in my emotional suffering while watching fictional content, that is. (love you guys)

4. What’s the craziest conversation you’ve overheard?

Not really a conversation I guess but outside my window some people walked by and all I hear is “I FUCKING LOVE PARADES” and no following response. You hear a lot of things from the surface when you live in a dragon’s lair basement.

5. What’s your favourite song at the moment?

I have several at any given moment based on what I find in my YouTube subscriptions, but if I were to pick one right now I guess it would be Flashin’ Like I’m Gatsby by Atom Smith, it’s an electroswing hop track. For a slower track right now I’d pick First Things First by Neon Trees. That and the entire Owlboy OST by Jonathan Geer. Quality content.

6. What languages do you wish you could speak?

Japanese and French probably. Japanese for anime/manga purposes and French because I’m in Canada and I used to love learning French in school.

7. Describe your idea of a ‘perfect day’

Oh boy time to crank out some radical, overly detailed hypotheticals. -cracks knuckles-

I wake up at a decent hour, well rested for the first time in forever, no anxiety or depression clawing at the walls of my brain. I had a dream that night that was either interesting enough to right down or gives me an idea for a character design. I get out of my bedroom in my own apartment, and greet my two cats who are likely named after my characters and have subsequent Warrior cat names as well.

Sunlight comes in through the sliding doors, the cats watch the birds on the feeder outside on the balcony. I see some of my favourites there to meet us: cardinals, blue jays, maybe an oriole or a hummingbird depending on the season. If it’s winter, snow is gently falling, with no wind to whip it around. I live in a small enough town or city that the view out the window is of more organic scenery rather than concrete, maybe there’s a river or a body of water nearby and it’s at least relatively quiet.

I stay in my comfortable clothes for a while as I mull over the idea I have in my head and make breakfast (or lunch, depending on the time), listening to music as I make it. Maybe pancakes with bacon, strawberries on the side. Or if I’m feeling like a sandwich I’ll have a BLT. I don’t feel sick after eating it so close to waking up like I usually do.

Suddenly, the design I had clicks into a viable story. The ideas start flowing, and I’m completely taken into my imagination, reality doesn’t exist for a little while as I dive headfirst into this world of new if unclear possibilities. I write and draw things for it, likely pacing around the room and talking to myself to work things out. Much to the confusion of my cats, I’m sure.

I make something viable enough to post, and I feel excited enough to rant about it to my heart’s content, no fear. Feeling satisfied in my endeavours, I get to work on what I need to do that day, like making a comic page for the week and making a new design for Redbubble. If I have freelance work to do, that takes priority, knowing that I’ll need the evening to get together with my friends.

I wear my favourite colours, hat and scarf probably with a star on it somewhere, I feel cute but comfortable, no inhibitions about what I look like for once. We go out to eat (knowing my friends it’s probably sushi), maybe see a new animated movie that’s out and analyze the heck out of it. We laugh and talk for hours, a complete unit of solidarity in our combined friendship. I hear they’re all doing well in their endeavours, and I’m immensely proud of them.

I get back home in the evening, greeting my cats once again. The stars are out, and I stargaze for a little bit. I come back in and relax on the couch to watch TV or play a video game of some kind, probably scroll through my social feeds / check messages. I see pictures of the time out with my friends and I’m actually in them this time.

I get a message from whoever I consider to be my best friend, either from after the hangout if they were there or from earlier. We start chatting about art we’re making or ideas we have, bouncing them off left and right and encouraging each other the whole way. If we’re old friends, it’ll feel like it did back in grade school with our late night Facebook chats.

I go to bed feeling happy, and probably with at least one of my cats sleeping on me in a precarious spot. It doesn’t take long for me to fall asleep, aside from maybe the ideas still flowing. If so, I take some time to read or something down and then sleep, not too concerned about what’ll happen tomorrow.

8. What’s the worst movie trope in your opinion?

The first one that comes to mind for me is the “liar revealed” plot, overused and often a lazy source for conflict in the third act. I also hate forced romance in general but I’m not sure if that’s consider a trope or something broader. This applies to TV shows too.

9. What made you laugh the hardest ever in your life?

Hysterical laughter at reckless hours of the morning is what allowed me to survive college and the apocalypse that was 2016, so there are quite a few moments. One of them happened during a particularly bad bout of depression while I was alone in Toronto for the summer. Out of morbid curiosity I watched a shitty theatre rip of the Emoji Movie online to kill time while I couldn’t sleep (don’t ever do that, not recommended). Then my friend sends me her drawing of Spyro to make me feel better (important note: she doesn’t draw dragons) with a funny caption and I lose my fucking mind. Just... gone, immediately. After the soul-sucking depravity of that movie and my depression combined I’ll bet anything was funny. At that point I didn’t even care if I was being loud at whatever time it was at night I was WHEEZING. Bless my friend.

10. What animal is the most majestic?

All.

(though I am partial to dragons, cats and birds)

11. If you could afford everything, what kind of clothes would you wear?

I’ve noticed I often dress myself like a character designer would when it comes to colour coordination (hard to turn that part of my brain off lol), so I guess I would continue doing that but tailor it even more to that idea. That and fandom shirts all the time. And custom cosplay outfits that I could commission from other people, of both my fave characters and my own OCs. I make armour designs a lot so that would be so much fun. If I were a bolder personality I would probably wear the cosplays in public and see how many people notice, or see if it makes a kid excitedly point at me. If I could act I would recite a quote or two for them. It would be quite the game with something more subtle, and you get that one fan on the subway coming out of the woodwork like “...are you dressed like _____ from ______?”.

#stole from my buddy again lmao #long post #this was fun #if you want to do this go ahead!#i don't really tag aha #text

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fashiontrendin-blog · 6 years ago

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How I Avoided Sunday Scaries Last Week: A Detailed Account

http://fashion-trendin.com/how-i-avoided-sunday-scaries-last-week-a-detailed-account/

How I Avoided Sunday Scaries Last Week: A Detailed Account

This Sunday Scaries diary starts in the middle of the night…

4:30 a.m.

I wake up to Avi getting out of my bed and leaving the room. I presume he’s moving to the couch, which he occasionally does when he’s having insomnia and is nervous about waking me up. I lay awake for 30 minutes, mind turning over the previous day. When I hear him stir, I say that I’m awake too, and he joins me back in bed. We talk for the next hour about life — what’s keeping us up, what’s exciting us, getting us down — and eventually both drift off to sleep.

9:50 a.m.

I wake up to Avi’s voice: “My mom’s flight just landed.”

“What time is it?”

“9:50.”

“She’s early.”

“Yeah. I gotta go. I’ll call you.”

He pulls on his pants, kisses my check and is gone.

10 a.m.

I lay in bed and consider falling back asleep. I had a rough couple nights of sleep and have been playing catch-up. When I realize it’s not going to happen, I succumb to the blue light and check my phone. It’s dead. The memory of last night returns: My charger wasn’t plugging in properly, as if there was something stuck in the inlet. I grab my phone, my sewing kit, and make my way to the couch.

10:21 a.m.

I’ve been using various tools to dig something out of the charging port of my phone for 20 minutes. It looks like cookie dough. I’m squinting and trying to see inside. I don’t test it until I’m confident it feels clean. When I finally try the charger, it works. Hurray! Blessed be the fruit.

10:24 a.m.

I decide to make myself a smoothie bowl, which have a reputation for being snooty and expensive, but which I think might be the hidden secret of breakfast. The ones I make are cheap, healthy-ish, delicious and don’t require fresh food. Here’s how I make them:

-One frozen banana (I keep a bowl of them in my freezer at all times) -A big handful of whatever frozen berries I have on hand (usually blueberries, strawberries and raspberries) -A few glugs of almond milk (I buy cartons two at a time and they last forever) -A tablespoon of flax seeds (or chia seeds, or whatever seeds) -Blend until smooth -Top with honey, gluten-free granola, goji berries

As the blender roars, I make up a story in my head about my neighbors hating the all-too-frequent sound and having an inside joke about how much they hate me. When it’s done, I return to the couch with my bowl. I reach for the remote but stop myself and grab a book instead. I’m reading Eileen by Ottessa Moshfegh.

“Reading makes me happier than TV,” I announce to an empty room, like a weirdo.

10:45 a.m.

I’m still reading Eileen. It’s good.

11 a.m.

I suddenly occurs to me, mid-page, that there were two Man Repeller stories I was supposed to finish editing on Friday but didn’t. I drag my computer to the couch and get to work on editing what will eventually become 12 Home Decor Tips I Can’t Stop Thinking About and Why “Black Girl Magic” Doesn’t Always Sit Right With Me.

11:22 a.m.

My brother Andy FaceTimes me mid-edit. He’s smooshed into his couch too. We rehash the picnic we had last night at Transmitter Park. He had to leave early and wants to know what he missed. He has a general existential fear of missing out, which always makes me laugh because I don’t know anyone who does as much fun and interesting stuff as he does.

12:35 p.m.

I finish editing and suddenly remember I’m supposed to be recording my day today for Man Repeller’s Sunday Scaries franchise. I spend the next 15 minutes documenting the above. Now I need to rush to get ready to meet up with Avi and his mom for lunch.

12:55 p.m.

I shower off but decide not to do anything with my hair as it looks fine. For my skin, I put on EasyDew Active Soothing Serum mixed with The Nue Co vitamin-C power to start, followed by Honest Beauty Nourishing Lotion, then Glossier sunscreen mixed with a drop of Drunk Elephant bronzing liquid, and finish with Glossier Cloud Paint in Haze. Then I move to my closet to get dressed.

1:19 p.m.

Omg. That took me forever and I don’t even like my outfit. I panicked! How does one dress for a day with one’s boyfriend’s mother when one has no idea what the day entails? After trying a basic dress and sandals and realizing I felt entirely unlike myself, I put on navy blue wide-leg pants I haven’t worn in a year and a black puff-sleeve shirt. I feel very whatever about this outfit but I have no further time to deliberate or I’ll be late!

1:25 p.m.

IT IS VERY HOT. Why am I wearing pants? Why am I wearing such dark colors? I’m fired.

1:42 p.m.

I arrive at Avi’s looking so hot and sweaty his mother immediately dotes on me — bringing me water, sitting me in front of the air conditioner, etc. It’s very sweet. Avi says he’s calling a car because we’re going to Jackson Heights! As they put on their shoes, I run downstairs and buy myself an iced coffee.

1:58 p.m.

Avi, his mother Rita and I are squeezed into the back of a car on our way to Queens. Rita and I are discussing how chubby Avi was as a baby. She says her doctor put him on a diet at six weeks old! Apparently he was taking down double the milk he was supposed to. This delights me to no end.

2:25 p.m.

We arrive at Sri Maha Vallabha GanaPati, a Hindu temple in Queens — said to be one of the first Hindu temples in the U.S. (Also, did you know some people call Queens one of the most diverse places on Earth? The whole neighborhood is incredible and feels completely different depending on where in the borough you are.)

We remove our shoes before entering the temple and I take note of a sign that says shorts and ripped jeans are prohibited. I’m suddenly thankful for my full-coverage outfit. Avi and I walk around looking at the shrines, leaving his mother to pray on her own. I’m struck by one of the plaques that reads: “When I study, grant me success (by means of right understanding) always.” I make a mental note; I like that definition of success.

2:53 p.m.

After we leave, we head to the temple canteen for lunch, which Avi heard serves the best Dosa in New York. The canteen is underground, looks like a cafeteria and smells delicious. We order too much food, confirm it is indeed the best dosa, and spend the meal discussing Indian politics, Avi’s mother’s argument with Avi’s father about what car to buy next, and Avi’s mother’s similarities to my mother.

4:09 p.m.

After a long lunch, we head out. Next we are going to Patel Brothers, which is the largest Indian American supermarket chain in the U.S. It’s a mile away. We decide to walk because it’s beautiful out. I’m not worried about a thing, except that my brother missed out on lunch. (He’s been talking about going to Jackson Heights for months.)

Avi and I are laughing because we can’t seem to get 10 feet without his mother stopping to identify a plant and discuss its properties. It’s very charming.

Avi: “Mom, you’re too Michigan. Have you ever walked a mile straight?”

Rita: “This is the simple life, Avi. You should learn it.”

4:28 p.m.

We arrive at Patel Brothers. I follow the two of them around like a puppy, laughing in delight as they argue about things like whether Avi needs a 50-pound bag of rice. At times I can’t tell who is trolling who.

5:04 p.m.

All done! When we walk outside, it feels like it’s going to rain, so I call us a car home. The train would take double the time, unfortunately. When it arrives, we pile in for a 40-minute ride back to Bed-Stuy, Brooklyn, where we both live.

5:32 p.m.

On the drive home, I feel a vague fondness for driving on the highway. I don’t do it much. The car is lulling me to sleep. Our middle-of-the-night antics are catching up to me.

6:11 p.m.

We are home! Took much longer than expected. I immediately crank Avi’s A/C unit and put on one of his sweatshirts — I’m in the mood to be cozy. Avi puts on a Michael Bublé holiday music video as a joke to tease his mom, who he claims loves Bublé, which she denies. We pretend it’s Christmas for three minutes while Rita makes us tea.

6:40 p.m.

Tea’s up. Avi puts on Jaws for our afternoon nap time, for no discernible reason.

6:57 p.m.

Wow, the aesthetic of Jaws is amazing. The whole thing looks like it’s been run through a Huji filter, and the clothes are on point too. Avi gets up to cook, leaving me and Rita on the couch as she critiques every scene aloud, which is making me laugh.

Rita: “This is bad direction, no?”

7:47 p.m.

The light is dwindling outside. The house is filling with the smell of garlic. Tomorrow is Monday. I wish tomorrow was Sunday instead.

8:38 p.m.

I decide I would watch any movie with Rita commentary turned on.

8:45 p.m.

Jaws ends right as Avi brings us plates of food: sesame wings over rice with pickled carrots (a recipe he’s been perfecting this month that he found on Smitten Kitchen). He puts on cooking videos while we eat. He’s a good TV host — always picking random entertaining things to put on during downtime. The three of us watch a video of a person making cheesecake, and then cookies, and then a home-made iced latte. During the third one, as the guy goes to great lengths to roast his own coffee beans, Rita expresses her disapproval:

Rita: “No way.” Avi: “What ma?” Rita: “Why would you do all this? You can just buy one.” Avi: “He’s not doing it because he wants a coffee, he’s doing it because he wants to do it.” Me: “He’s stopping and smelling the roses!” Rita: “I think he needs to go to a third world country and see what’s really important.”

Fair enough.

9:17 p.m.

I wash Avi’s dishes as a thank you for cooking for us and then pack up to head home. My eyes are stinging, I think from the sunscreen I put on earlier that morning; it’s making me feel exhausted. Or maybe I’m just genuinely exhausted.

9:27 p.m.

Avi walks me to the train and waits on the platform with me until it comes. We chat and reflect on the day until the very last second, at which point I kiss him and run onto the train car. He watches me go. It’s all very old-timey.

9:41 p.m.

Hello home! Hello Bug.

10 p.m.

I put on PJs, brush my teeth and do my skincare routine right away because I know if I sit down on the couch now I’ll never get up. On my skin, I use Paula’s Choice cleansing oil to start, then Glossier face wash followed by Peach & Lilly toner, and then finish by mixing Caudalie face cream with a couple drops of Drunk Elephant face oil (I’ve been dry lately).

10:11 p.m.

I sit down on the couch and solve the Rubick’s cube on my coffee table in under three minutes, my latest party trick. Someone sent a Rubick’s cube to the Man Repeller office this summer and I took it home because I’ve always wanted to learn how to solve one. About a month ago, Avi and I decided to dedicate an entire night to learning. Hunched over a Youtube tutorial we figured it out together, and we’ve spent the last few weeks trying to beat each other’s times.

10:35 p.m.

I’m in bed now. I set my alarm for therapy tomorrow morning. I normally go on Friday mornings but I was sick last week so my therapist kindly rescheduled. I grab Eileen to read myself to sleep.

10:37 p.m.

Wait! I forgot to meditate. I open Headspace and do a five-minute session laying down, which I think is cheating. It’s a miracle I didn’t fall asleep.

10:42 p.m.

Okay, now it’s actually bedtime. Night!

23 PHOTOS click for more

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consulting-celiac-in-the-tardis · 7 years ago

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15 Self Care Activities You Can Do in 15 Minutes or Less

New blog post! I get it: when life gets busy, setting aside time for self care can seem impossible. However, self care activities are perhaps the most important when your to-do list seems like a mile long.

As I start my third month of grad school, I can definitely relate. In fact, this past weekend felt like nothing but food prep, grading papers, lesson planning, squeezing in a few hours of socializing, blogging work and sleep. Hence, this list of 15 self care ideas that take 15 minutes or less!

Whether you're a college student, a first-year teacher, a badass full-time worker or the parent of three hyper kids, here are 15 fun ways to add 15 minutes of self care to your life this week!

1. Write - and send - a letter.

There's something endearing about handwritten letters. It takes more thought and effort than shooting off a text or Facebook message (though I'll never turn down a funny meme or random "thinking of you" text from my besties). If the person you're writing to values letters like I do, your reminder to smile might even end up pinned to a bulletin board in their room.

Plus, the act of writing a letter can be rewarding in itself. Research has linked expressive writing - including writing letters - to improved mood, reduced stress levels and an overall boost in wellbeing.

So why not pick up a pen, a piece of paper and give a loved one an old-fashioned surprise?

2. Unleash your inner yogi and stretch it out.

First of all: it doesn't matter if you've never done yoga or have no idea what kind of stretches you "should" be doing. The goal of "self care" activities like this is to, well, care for yourself. So let what feels good guide your stretching!

If you have fibromyalgia (or another muscle-related chronic illness) like me, taking mini stretch breaks is vital. Sometimes, I get so "into" my work that I don't realize several hours have past and my shoulders are hiked up to my ears. Being more aware of how my body is feeling can prevent a migraine or extreme body aches from sidelining me hours later.

If you want to follow a "proper" yoga routine for your 15 minutes of stretching, I highly recommend Fightmaster Yoga on YouTube. Otherwise, you do you!

3. Watch a cute cat (or goat...or any adorable animal) video.

Admit it: there's something insanely relaxing about watching baby goats in onesies practice jumping or seeing a kitten play peekaboo. You're also not the only one whose stress level drops after watching a cute animal video. Scientists have actually discovered that cute videos trigger a release of dopamine - AKA, one of our "happy hormones" - in viewers' brains.

Apparently, people's love of cute things has ties to evolution; basically, our brains are trying to ensure we properly care for our adorable infants. All that really matters, though, is that you now have a science-backed reason to crank up the cat videos during your Monday lunch hour!

Like this post? Then tweet me some love by clicking here: "Too busy for #selfcare? Then check out these 15 self care activities you can do in 15 mins or less! #health #selflove http://bit.ly/2y6j2vm"

4. Throw a (solo or friend-filled) dance party.

Do I really need to explain this one? Dancing is fun. Dancing to your favorite pick-me-up songs is even more fun. And dancing without worrying what anyone thinks of your super groovy dance moves is a blast!

The hit of adrenaline from your mini-burst of exercise doesn't hurt either!

5. Go for a walk in nature.

Can’t stop thinking about the mistake you made during your big presentation or the annoying co-worker who works at the desk across from yours? Then taking a walk outside is exactly the self-care tip you need.

Everyone has moments of brooding, or nonstop thinking on negative parts of your day or life. Research has found, though, that spending time walking outside in nature can decrease brooding and improve mental health. And even if you aren’t brooding, spending some quality time with your local park can’t hurt. So find a nature trail and get walkin’!

6. Prep a delicious dinner.

If you're a foodie like me, a delicious meal is a great way to show people that you care. Sometimes, though, we forget to show ourselves the same edible self love!

Even if you're short on time, you can lay the groundwork for a delicious meal later on. Cut up some veggies that you can roast while you work; put your choice of protein in a marinade to soak up flavor while you're away; throw a bunch of ingredients in the slow cooker (following recipes like these!); or even Google and bookmark a recipe that looks yummy and easy to make.

Remind yourself that you need fuel to kick life's booty...and that you're worthy of making fuel that actually tastes finger-lickin' good!

7. Look at your calendar and schedule at least one "just for fun" activity that week.

Once you get in the mindset of "work, work, work," it can be hard to remember to give yourself the social breaks you need. Prevent yourself from putting on "productivity blinders" by spending a few minutes adding at least one fun event into your weekly schedule.

Of course, we all have different definitions of "fun" - and as long as you're enjoying yourself and taking a break from work, anything is fair game! Have a spa; go for a walk with a friend; curl up with a good book in your favorite coffee shop; binge watch Netflix for a few hours in your PJ's. The choice of how to have fun is up to you!

And if an even more amazing social opportunity comes your way - like a girls' night out - you already have some time set aside in your schedule to join in.

Like this post? Then tweet me some love by clicking here: "Too busy for #selfcare? Then check out these 15 self care activities you can do in 15 mins or less! #health #selflove http://bit.ly/2y6j2vm"

9. Start and finish one (tiny) chore.

Raise your hand if you've ever felt like you have so much to do, you don't know where to start. Between blogging, teaching, taking classes and doing everything needed to stay alive, I can 100% relate. One self care tip I've started following regularly, though, is doing little chores any spare chance I get...and patting my back for a job well done.

For instance, let's say you need to finish a 10-page paper, write and publish a blog post and reply to five important emails. Which should you start with first? While it may feel the most rewarding to finish your paper or blog post, it'll probably take less time to shoot off a couple emails - and then you'll already have succeeded crossing one "to do" off your list!

8. Work it out (literally)!

You may already know that exercise is an easy way to boost overall health, with studies finding that exercise increases endorphins (aka, the “happy hormones”) and norepinephrine, a chemical that can improve your brain’s reaction to stress. Not to mention all the physical benefits exercise offers.

However, you may not realize that even 15 minutes of exercise can make a difference. Research shows that short (as little as ten minute!) bursts of intense exercise are just as effective as 45-minute workouts in improving heart health and other indicators of fitness. And trust me. If you do a 15 minute HIIT workout or even just a moderate weight lifting session, you still get that endorphin rush!

Some of my favorite short workouts are quick targeted workouts (like abs or cardio) on the free Nike+ Training App; a random combination of jumping jacks, jogging, push-ups or whatever other exercises pop in my head; or even a short 15-minute sprint on the treadmill or elliptical. Find what works for you and for your body, and stick with it.

10. Get lost in a book.

When you’re feeling stressed out, what’s a better escape than visiting another “world” through a good book? It turns out that there are way more benefits of reading than you might expect. Studies have found that reading for as little as 30 minutes a day is associated with a longer lifespan and a more extensive vocabulary. Reading even a chapter of a fiction novel has also been linked to increased empathy. Talk about self care that doubles as self development!

If you love reading but never have the time (trust me - as a grad student earning an MFA in writing, I can relate!), start scheduling 15 minute reading breaks into your week. You’ll be amazed at how much you look forward to putting down your laptop and picking up a book instead.

11. Eat something delicious.

“Comfort eating” has a slightly negative connotation nowadays, with it often associated with unhealthy binges on junk food or mindless snacking. While it’s unlikely that either of those two habits are healthy, I do think there are times when you just need a big, juicy burger or creamy bowl of ice cream.

Food is fuel - but it is also memories and quality time with friends and family and, yes, sometimes exactly the kind of comfort you need. So if your brutal week calls for a visit to a local bakery for a cookie the size of your head, eat and enjoy the dang cookie - and then keep kicking life’s booty!

Like this post? Then tweet me some love by clicking here: "Too busy for #selfcare? Then check out these 15 self care activities you can do in 15 mins or less! #health #selflove http://bit.ly/2y6j2vm"

12. Explore somewhere new.

You don't need hours - or even days - away from home to go on adventure somewhere new. Oftentimes, there are plenty of hidden gems to explore near your own front yard. Instead of swinging by Starbucks like usual, check out the cute local coffee shop a few blocks away. Take a different path around your favorite park. If you're a foodie like me, you might even want to spend your 15 minutes walking around a new-to-you grocery store. (Does anyone else love finding new grocery stores, or am I just weird?)

Who knows - you may find your new favorite local hangout!

13. Give yourself permission to do absolutely nothing.

I'll admit it: I’m slightly addicted to productivity. Even when I’m taking a break from work, I’m usually working out or working on a side project like baking or blogging. If you can relate, why not give yourself the gift of 15 minutes spent doing absolutely nothing?

Lie in bed, waste time scrolling through Instagram, watch the sunset, do some people watching. Those fifteen minutes of “nothing-ness” are yours to do with what you wish. Just don’t do anything productive!

14. Call home or a good friend - and be honest about how you're feeling.

When you're jumping from one obligation to the next, it's easy to forget to check in with the people you love most. So why not make calling home an official part of your weekly schedule? Researchers have reported that hearing a loved one's voice can actually trigger jumps in particular hormones and nerves. In fact, one study found that hearing a mother's (or father's) voice caused a jump in pleasure areas of children's brains.

Don't just talk about the weather either; really talk. Advice from an old friend about a problem you're struggling with or some reassuring words from mom may be exactly what you need.

15. Look back on your week and make a list of everything you’ve done, no matter how small.

It never hurts to remind yourself what a true badass you really are! Sometimes we can get so focused on the things we still need to get done or the mistakes we’ve made that we forget about everything we majorly #slayed that week. So take 15 minutes to review everything you’ve kicked booty at during the week - and don't forget to mention the small stuff, too. Research has found that, when people acknowledge their small successes, they not only boost their self confidence, but also have more motivation to work. This isn't bragging - it's setting yourself up for another killer week!

Like this post? Then tweet me some love by clicking here: "Too busy for #selfcare? Then check out these 15 self care activities you can do in 15 mins or less! #health #selflove http://bit.ly/2y6j2vm"

Regardless of which of these self care ideas you want to add to your weekly routine, one thing is certain: no matter how limited your free time, there's always time for a little self love.

And as I prepare for another crazy week of grad school, you can bet that several of these self care activities are landing on my to-do list! What's your favorite self care activity? Which of these would you want to try first? Tell me in the comments!

via Blogger http://ift.tt/2kJ7j2B

#Blogger #college #celiac #gluten free #coeliac #celiacs #paleo #primal #foodporn #foodart

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lesbiancouplescounseling · 4 years ago

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I tell those women (and I’m telling you) it doesn’t matter. You can save your marriage alone!

Breathe that in for a second.

I guarantee that you can change your relationship if you’re the only one trying. Even if your wife is disconnected, angry, complacent, or threatening to leave.

It’s true. One person can change a marriage, alone.

Hold onto that feeling. It will help you make the shifts within yourself that can save your marriage.

Let me be clear — I’m not suggesting that everything wrong with your relationship is your fault. Or that you’re the only one that needs to change in order to have a great marriage.

Ultimately, you’ll both have to do some things differently in order to create an awesome, secure and happy relationship.

But here’s the thing…

Do you really want to save your relationship?

Then start a positive feedback-loop by being brave and doing a few things differently. The key is to make a few simple shifts in order to disrupt the vicious cycle you two are stuck in.

You know the saying…you can’t keep doing the same things over and over and expect to get different results.

Three inner shifts that can save your relationship:

1. Tap into your WHY